this is so damn funny! omg!!! watch it and eat your heart out. =p
Feb 28, 2007
Feb 25, 2007
mommy told me about her friend's son in NUS who wants to take a semester off because he can't cope with the stress of school anymore and he doesn't want to lose it. and i was thinking how this whole double major and assorted stress is worth it. well this semester is really quite a busy semester, and then there's work and every other thing.
and it seems that everyone is so busy and so stressed. always functioning just below that threshold. i am so glad that the holidays are here because i am almost at the max that i could take.
singaporeans, the have-nots will always be studying here, in a system that stretches you thin, encouraged apathy and rejects pro-active and initiative, and the very system then wonders about patriotism. the same system whereby the haves will be studying overseas regardless if they could or could not enter the singapore universities and they do really well there (despite not being able to enter the local system) and they come back being much more respected than the have-nots just because of some US, UK or that is not from singapore.
wondering about income gap or income disparity? well, it is not a case where the rich get richer and the poor get richer. its indeed the rich get MUCH richer and the poor gets poorer.
welcome to my country.
and it seems that everyone is so busy and so stressed. always functioning just below that threshold. i am so glad that the holidays are here because i am almost at the max that i could take.
singaporeans, the have-nots will always be studying here, in a system that stretches you thin, encouraged apathy and rejects pro-active and initiative, and the very system then wonders about patriotism. the same system whereby the haves will be studying overseas regardless if they could or could not enter the singapore universities and they do really well there (despite not being able to enter the local system) and they come back being much more respected than the have-nots just because of some US, UK or
wondering about income gap or income disparity? well, it is not a case where the rich get richer and the poor get richer. its indeed the rich get MUCH richer and the poor gets poorer.
welcome to my country.
Feb 20, 2007
after so many months and years, the scars do not go away. and they only serve to remind me that beneath this happy-go-lucky, this cheerful exterior is just a messed up person who yearns for affection and love. it is just a little boy that wants to be hug.
years go by but nothing really changes. and sitting here looking at myself, and i wonder what a failure i've been.
happy chinese new year to me.
years go by but nothing really changes. and sitting here looking at myself, and i wonder what a failure i've been.
happy chinese new year to me.
Feb 19, 2007
what is the point of saying what a person feels when nothing is done thereafter. hence what is the whole point of talking. shouldn't a person's action also strives to make the other person comfortable? if everybody should be able to do exactly what they want without considering the other person, then wouldn't the world be in chaos.
if someone express discomfort, should we then still go ahead with the thing that makes the person uncomfortable to make the person even more uncomfortable?
if someone express discomfort, should we then still go ahead with the thing that makes the person uncomfortable to make the person even more uncomfortable?
Feb 18, 2007
Feb 14, 2007
in the midst of studying again, and i am beginning to love this peaceful feeling even more. talking to someone about my anger management issues is really helping a lot. well for starters i am a lot more patient these days (even alexis and lynette noted that!)
and the book 'the art of happiness' puts its more into perspective. life, and the purpose of life.
ah, what a sweet serenity.
and the book 'the art of happiness' puts its more into perspective. life, and the purpose of life.
ah, what a sweet serenity.
in the midst of studying for a quiz and listening to music on a quiet night. everything seems peaceful. all that's missing from this night is just someone by my side.
i like how music set the mood. how if the music changes, the entire experience changes.
and right now, its making appreciate everything around me, enjoying this moment.
i like how music set the mood. how if the music changes, the entire experience changes.
and right now, its making appreciate everything around me, enjoying this moment.
Feb 11, 2007
awww, thanks to all of you for being so nice and concerned over my scuffle with my mom. not exactly a scuffle but well. you know woman are damn weird! immediately after she yelled at me, she came home and talked to me as if nothing has happened. can you imagine how off balanced i was feeling. it is such a weird moment for me.
but things are fine now, and it seems that she don't really want me to go over because she doesn't think gay relationship can last a lifetime and therefore i shouldn't waste money, not that she can't accept me being gay - i think my father is better at that than my mom.
baby was comforting in his way, rationalizing things for me to see. and well it appears that all moms speak like that - for who knows what reason. and i decided that i will prove my mom wrong! that i am going to grow old with my baby =)
hehehehehe. alright, that was mushy enough!
but things are fine now, and it seems that she don't really want me to go over because she doesn't think gay relationship can last a lifetime and therefore i shouldn't waste money, not that she can't accept me being gay - i think my father is better at that than my mom.
baby was comforting in his way, rationalizing things for me to see. and well it appears that all moms speak like that - for who knows what reason. and i decided that i will prove my mom wrong! that i am going to grow old with my baby =)
hehehehehe. alright, that was mushy enough!
Feb 9, 2007
its not as if a long distance relationship is not hard enough as it already is. then there's the whole issue of not meeting and my mom actually thinks that not meeting for an entire year is alright, in fact it is quite a lot to meet once a year. i told her that in june i would like to find him, then she just started screaming like a mad woman. i have no idea why. she went on and on about she doesn't know why i have to go to melbourne again. why not another place.
its not as if she doesn't know i am dating him. then she went on to say that there are many people who date overseas but don't meet, i told her fuck you, find one person for me and she couldn't. she said that she and my dad. she's malaysian and my dad's indonesian. yar right. they both stayed in singapore when they dated.
damn fucked up.
and its not as if i am not stressed out and maxed out by school. i worked hard and study hard so i can finance myself, don't tax my parents too much, and give them a good life for taking care of me, and she keeps saying till like i am the most useless thing on earth, i love her so much why does she hate me so much.
its not as if she doesn't know i am dating him. then she went on to say that there are many people who date overseas but don't meet, i told her fuck you, find one person for me and she couldn't. she said that she and my dad. she's malaysian and my dad's indonesian. yar right. they both stayed in singapore when they dated.
damn fucked up.
and its not as if i am not stressed out and maxed out by school. i worked hard and study hard so i can finance myself, don't tax my parents too much, and give them a good life for taking care of me, and she keeps saying till like i am the most useless thing on earth, i love her so much why does she hate me so much.
Feb 8, 2007
in our lecture today, we covered something called cognitive dissonance, one interesting question that was posed was that despite we all feel that clearing our readings by the week is better than leaving it all till the end of the semester, none of us do that.
then i talked to gabby and reflected on our situation. its not as if that we do not want to do our readings, in fact we are quite far behind. but this semester has really been quite overwhelming in terms of work, and we are working by deadlines.
everyday is filled up with school, assignments and planning for projects and a bit of readings. i can't possibly work without resting at all. i need to rest and relax and talk to my baby (=p). so i need my tv shows and skype hours. seriously 24 hours a day is a stretch. and i do not have much time left for my darling friends or even swimming! over and on top of that, i have to give tuition for pocket money. sigh
what an overwhelming semester. i want my life back!
then i talked to gabby and reflected on our situation. its not as if that we do not want to do our readings, in fact we are quite far behind. but this semester has really been quite overwhelming in terms of work, and we are working by deadlines.
everyday is filled up with school, assignments and planning for projects and a bit of readings. i can't possibly work without resting at all. i need to rest and relax and talk to my baby (=p). so i need my tv shows and skype hours. seriously 24 hours a day is a stretch. and i do not have much time left for my darling friends or even swimming! over and on top of that, i have to give tuition for pocket money. sigh
what an overwhelming semester. i want my life back!
Feb 2, 2007
what really scares me is how emotions and anger can consume. and how being more educated doesn't make any more difference. in fact it only seems to make things worse because the more educated we all get, the more we know, the more we all think we are right.
spent the whole night doing statistics is quite draining, and to top it up there's a stats lecture. following stats lecture is interpersonal. and taking that course makes me so much more aware, but it doesn't seem to be making it better (i think it does, but i am not really sure)
according to various measures, i am an idealistic romantic. and being romantic in outlook is apparently not as good because of unrealistic expectations. the 6 unrealistic and damaging expectations
1. disagreements are destructive
2. partners cannot change
3. mindreading is essential
4. sex must be perfect everytime
5. men and women are just different
6. great relationship just happens
well, number 5 doesn't really apply. but i suppose i need to change my paradigm. great relationships take effort and work. and disagreements are opportunities to know each other better. and that humans all change with interaction to each other.
"well now I am grown
and these years have shown
that rain's a part of how life goes
but it's dark and it's late
so I'll hold you and wait
'til your frightened eyes do close
and I hope that you'll know...
that nature is so
the same rain that draws you near me
falls on rivers and land
on forests and sand
makes the beautiful world that you'll see
in the morning
everything's fine in the morning
the rain'll be gone in the morning
but I'll still be here in the morning"
spent the whole night doing statistics is quite draining, and to top it up there's a stats lecture. following stats lecture is interpersonal. and taking that course makes me so much more aware, but it doesn't seem to be making it better (i think it does, but i am not really sure)
according to various measures, i am an idealistic romantic. and being romantic in outlook is apparently not as good because of unrealistic expectations. the 6 unrealistic and damaging expectations
1. disagreements are destructive
2. partners cannot change
3. mindreading is essential
4. sex must be perfect everytime
5. men and women are just different
6. great relationship just happens
well, number 5 doesn't really apply. but i suppose i need to change my paradigm. great relationships take effort and work. and disagreements are opportunities to know each other better. and that humans all change with interaction to each other.
"well now I am grown
and these years have shown
that rain's a part of how life goes
but it's dark and it's late
so I'll hold you and wait
'til your frightened eyes do close
and I hope that you'll know...
that nature is so
the same rain that draws you near me
falls on rivers and land
on forests and sand
makes the beautiful world that you'll see
in the morning
everything's fine in the morning
the rain'll be gone in the morning
but I'll still be here in the morning"
Jan 30, 2007
after so many years, i am still ENFP, after taking so many different test. haha according to the brutally honest test, me, lynette are still the same even after taking the REAL, paid for test.
apparently i am the
#####
i want to spend the rest of my entry complaining about alexis! i have a love hate relationship with her. she told me today that she doesn't think i am cute ($!%@%@%#!@%#!%!%!). then half an hour later, she told me that i am not cute, but good looking. she is sending me double-bind messages. so i don't really know to love her or to hate her. we decided that love-hate relationship is the way to go from now on!
hahahaha. lynette decided that i wasn't cute, but magazine good looking. that's why i like lynette. she tells good lies. LOL.
[my baby insist that i am narcisstic]
apparently i am the
Scumbag- ENFP 66% Extraversion, 73% Intuition, 23% Thinking, 40% Judging |
I have a feeling you're not going to like this much. Do I care? No. How do I know? It's because you hate criticism. You love to be loved and you'll do anything to be accepted.
*****************
*****************
|
 |
My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:
|
| Link: The Brutally Honest Personality Test written by UltimateMaster on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the The Dating Persona Test |
#####
i want to spend the rest of my entry complaining about alexis! i have a love hate relationship with her. she told me today that she doesn't think i am cute ($!%@%@%#!@%#!%!%!). then half an hour later, she told me that i am not cute, but good looking. she is sending me double-bind messages. so i don't really know to love her or to hate her. we decided that love-hate relationship is the way to go from now on!
hahahaha. lynette decided that i wasn't cute, but magazine good looking. that's why i like lynette. she tells good lies. LOL.
[my baby insist that i am narcisstic]
Jan 28, 2007
its one of those times i wonder if any of us knows exactly where we are going and what are we doing in life? it is one of those times i feel powerless and weak to stop the incredible force of the world. a world heading for destruction, a world hurtling towards the end and powerless to stop it.
every single policy, every single damn thing revolves around money, rather than saying we're a meritocracy society, i propose that we call ourselves a monetary society, and just gracefully admit we're all sluts for money. ALL OF US. we're slaving our lives away for money, for the superficial, for the glamourous.
we tax the poor to help the poor, we lower the taxes for the rich, lower corporate taxes for the rich, so the rich is going to get richer, and then the poor can get poorer. money. work. money. study, so that we can work in the future. money. money money money. money is indeed the new religion.
and with globalisation, the rich people can live in the richest and most comfortable places in the world, and pay taxes in the poorest place, so they pay the least tax. and for anybody who tries to tell you that everyone is better off. tell them to open their eyes. with capitalism comes some of the worst living conditions ever. just look at singapore, and walk behind the skyscraping towers, you'll see living conditions not a single one of you who can read this can ever imagine.
countries where water is scarce. EVERYWHERE. but you who is reading this, is still wasting water while brushing your teeth, taking plastic bags for nonsensically small items, throwing away paper and printing ONE SIDE on fresh unrecycled paper.
powerless to stop the mad worshipping of money and luxury.
at times like this i tell myself that all i want in my life is happiness. permanent happiness that even with no money, i will still be happy. and i will work towards being happy. being fulfilled, making myself feel happy in a way that money cannot make me feel.
every single policy, every single damn thing revolves around money, rather than saying we're a meritocracy society, i propose that we call ourselves a monetary society, and just gracefully admit we're all sluts for money. ALL OF US. we're slaving our lives away for money, for the superficial, for the glamourous.
we tax the poor to help the poor, we lower the taxes for the rich, lower corporate taxes for the rich, so the rich is going to get richer, and then the poor can get poorer. money. work. money. study, so that we can work in the future. money. money money money. money is indeed the new religion.
and with globalisation, the rich people can live in the richest and most comfortable places in the world, and pay taxes in the poorest place, so they pay the least tax. and for anybody who tries to tell you that everyone is better off. tell them to open their eyes. with capitalism comes some of the worst living conditions ever. just look at singapore, and walk behind the skyscraping towers, you'll see living conditions not a single one of you who can read this can ever imagine.
countries where water is scarce. EVERYWHERE. but you who is reading this, is still wasting water while brushing your teeth, taking plastic bags for nonsensically small items, throwing away paper and printing ONE SIDE on fresh unrecycled paper.
powerless to stop the mad worshipping of money and luxury.
at times like this i tell myself that all i want in my life is happiness. permanent happiness that even with no money, i will still be happy. and i will work towards being happy. being fulfilled, making myself feel happy in a way that money cannot make me feel.
Jan 25, 2007
Jan 20, 2007
you know your are in trouble when your own Chief of your software describe the upcoming software as "a pig", and concedes that if he was not working with your company he would buy a rival.
welcome Jim Allchin, Windows chief of Microsoft.
#####
In a 2004 e-mail to Chairman Bill Gates and CEO Steve Ballmer made public during opening arguments in December, Allchin criticized Windows and said ``I would buy a Mac today if I was not working at Microsoft.''
Allchin at the time was leading development of Longhorn, the code name for Windows Vista, which reaches stores Jan. 30. Allchin, who is retiring after Vista is released, referred to Longhorn as ``a pig'' and said ``we have lost our way.''
Read the full story here @ http://www.bloomberg.com/apps/news?pid=conewsstory&refer=conews&tkr=AAPL:US&sid=aZdk6J4hbFEg
welcome Jim Allchin, Windows chief of Microsoft.
#####
In a 2004 e-mail to Chairman Bill Gates and CEO Steve Ballmer made public during opening arguments in December, Allchin criticized Windows and said ``I would buy a Mac today if I was not working at Microsoft.''
Allchin at the time was leading development of Longhorn, the code name for Windows Vista, which reaches stores Jan. 30. Allchin, who is retiring after Vista is released, referred to Longhorn as ``a pig'' and said ``we have lost our way.''
Read the full story here @ http://www.bloomberg.com/apps/news?pid=conewsstory&refer=conews&tkr=AAPL:US&sid=aZdk6J4hbFEg
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