Reality?

Some things only becomes real when they are put into words

Interesting concept isn't it? Although honestly at 1am, I am really not able to elaborate on this very well. So i'll leave it as a good food thought at the moment.

The Plain @ Craig Road

After discovering The Plain about a month or so ago, and I've been there quite a few times especially for their brekkie, we decided to have lunch there today. It was @alexischeong's first time there, so as always she went camera crazy.

The Plain is a Melbourne inspired cafe (say hello to Vincent from Melbourne when you are there), and they rightly serve good coffee that Melburnians are accustomed to. Suffice to say, after you try that, you will NEVER drink Starbucks ever again. After my first cup of Melbourne coffee, I have only had 2 cups of Starbucks till date (and I didn't really have a choice during those 2 times)

I'll let the pictures do the talking. You can see more on @alexischeong's blog.

- life is indeed too short for bad coffees -

- which is why you need good lattes -

- and good ciabattas (salami and pastrami) -

- love the green sofa -

- and the decor -


- and the lovely setting -

Visit and say hello to Vincent and Leslie and tell them you are Scott's friends!

---

trading hours
open daily 7.30am - 7.30pm
closed the second & last wednesday of the month

enquiries / bookings
✆ +65 6225 4387
✉ 50 Craig Road, #01-01
Singapore 089688

I don't understand why Singaporean parents insist on having their kindergarten children go through a ceremony.

My dad told me about this crazy woman today who wrote to The State Times (letter copied below and can be read here until ST removes it) to complain about how her precious son cannot attend the kindergarten ceremony. Oh the horror right, so of course I had to read it. Oh the horror indeed - at the crazy woman.

She wrote to ST forum because the kindergarten (in their infinite wisdom, I must say) chose to do away with a full fledge graduation, but instead have a class representative to collect the scrolls, and put more effort into a song and dance item.

I think that this is a great idea because this is after-all a kindergarten. This is not high school, nor college. The kindergarten "degree" is nothing more than a certificate, and it is not even compulsory for children to attend. This mom sounds like those crazy competitive mom who would enroll her son in every damn course available, just so that SHE can get her own satisfaction of seeing her son go on stage to collect some award.

What about her son's feeling? Surely we don't want children as young as 5 or 6, to think that going on stage to get that scroll is the most important thing on earth; and other equally important parts in life such as having fun, being a team player (hence the dance) should be overlooked. At their time in life now, they should learn and enjoy learning in every way, not only in academics.

I am sorry, but I honestly do not see what this crazy woman's issue is, so much so that she needs to write to the press. And her words - of how the omission of the ceremony will "painfully felt by the parents" is so dramatic that, it left me speechless (well not exactly, considering the length of this note). But honestly if she has been to a graduation ceremony, the pain is sitting through 900 other names.

Of course the moment we get our scroll is a moment of glory for our parents, but seriously, yhis is KINDERGARTEN.

I have no more words left to say but that this woman is dumb. And boy am I glad I am not her son. She might be sad to find out that only in Singapore, do we have a graduation ceremony where we all go on stage individually. In most other countries, a representative collects it on his cohort's behalf.

But she will be too dumb to know anyway.

EDIT: I think we should do away with the scroll altogether for kindergarten. Why allow children so young to wonder why is some other kid chosen and not me (though I believe that they seldom feel that way, and its the parents who make their children feel this way).


-----------
Nov 11, 2010, ST

I ATTENDED the full-dress rehearsal of my six-year-old son's graduation ceremony at a grassroots kindergarten, PCF Pioneer Kindergarten, last Sunday.

I expected to see him and his fellow graduands go through the full, happy process - putting on graduation gowns and going on stage to collect their scrolls as the photographer took pictures.

Instead, the ceremony was reduced to a superficial shadow of what such milestones should be.

A pupil went on stage to receive the scrolls on behalf of each class. The focus appeared to be on the accompanying concert.

Shocked, I questioned the principal, who replied that the truncated ceremony had been the kindergarten's practice.

I was also given to understand that it was too time-consuming to have each pupil go on stage as the ceremony involved hundreds of graduating preschoolers.

Shouldn't the organisers focus on the primary purpose of the graduation ceremony, which is to acknowledge and celebrate the completion of a child's preschool education - marking that first milestone in their journey of lifelong learning?

Is the success of a dance item or two more important than recognising a child's first rite of passage?

Does the PCF headquarters issue guidelines to its kindergartens to ensure that such acknowledgements remain the primary focus of the ceremony?

My son's kindergarten ceremony is tomorrow. Except for the class representative, he and his fellow classmates face the unhappy prospect of not wearing the graduation gowns, not hearing their names called, not going on stage to receive their scrolls and not having their pictures taken.

The kindergarten may argue that it had fulfilled these separately earlier, but such canned arrangements of convenience defeat the purpose and spirit of a graduation ceremony.

The kindergarten's omission will be felt painfully by parents, unless the organisers do the proper thing: change its attitude and the ceremony, quickly.

Yap Wai Ling (Mrs)

If how I feel about my country is non of your business SM Goh, then why are you and your team leading our country?

When I read this article (http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=450063718719) on The Straits Times, the biggest thing that jumps to my face is how disconnected the ruling party is with the citizens, especially the future pillars of our country.

Already prices are going through the roof. Aside from the elites and the middle upper class of Singapore, everyone else is feeling the pinch of our policies. And of course we are still pandering to the rich, the elites of the foreign country, importing the foreigners by the tens of thousands to an already crowded Singapore. But these are the concerns of today's Singaporean working adult, and not entirely that of the younger Singaporeans.

When it comes down to the younger generation that is the Gen Y and below, the concerns are not just monetary. Its about how disempowered and the sense that we don't belong here that we are concerned about. And dear SM Goh's reply made me think about why is he even leading our country with his team.

We (as in my and my friends kinda we) were discussing today about this today and really the issue is not about foreigners. At least not directly, but the issue is about how we don't feel that we have the rights, the power to do anything here. We are just told time and time again, through our propaganda machinery that is the press, about decisions that are already made.

Our policies are all about the money, all about the foreigners and our relentless development. And at what cost we must ask ourselves. I was just saying to quite a few people that I have no memories about this place. All my childhood memory is gone, nothing in my childhood exist today. Anything and everything will be razed to the ground in the name of development. As if hardware is all that is important in a country.

People do not matter here in Singapore, we are just a number, a statistic. Who really cares about the Singaporeans? This is why we import foreigners at the rate that we are. Aside from being able to buy those damn HDB, and the passport that gives us mostly visa-less travel, and that some of the privilege few gets a good education, I cannot think of much more "benefits" of being a Singaporean.

Who loves Singapore? The foreigners of course. We literally kiss the ground they walk on, so of course they love Singapore. They can just come in here, earn all the money they want to, and then leave. If they love Singapore so much, ask them all to become Singapore citizen and give up their own citizenship then. And then you see how much "love" that they have. Hypocrites much.

Stupid are the people who will read this and go, but no country is perfect. Obviously not, nobody ever said that any country is perfect, or that there is a perfect system. But more stupid are people who think that this is the best and therefore we shouldn't change nor improve.

Singapore is a great place for foreigners for example. We do have ridiculously cheap food (but at what expense to the hawkers, we might want to question). Singapore is also safe and efficient, almost like clockwork. But when you ask anyone about Singapore, you will then realize that everyone will tell you about the tangibles, but there's nothing intangible that anyone will miss about Singapore.

Telling isn't it? And food, really? When you have travelled enough, you will realize that there's nothing spectacular about our food, aside from it being cheap.

If my family is not in Singapore, I will really not be here. Because this is not home for me. Nowhere is home to me. I am in a place, and this place is Singapore at the moment. My home is where my family is. I don't miss Singapore as a place when I overseas, I miss my family who are in Singapore.

If SM Goh cannot understand this, he should perhaps ask his own daughter. Who happens to be, surprise surprise, NOT in Singapore

You should also read: http://lacedivory.blogspot.com/2010/10/my-love-hate-relationship-with-my.html

9 full months later

I can quite safely say that, the dust has finally settled. And for those who know what 平常心 means, I'm finally able to say that everything has been replaced a 平常心.

A stone has finally been lifted from these shoulders for the past 9 months. It has not been easy. I must say I managed to have nearly zero collateral damage along the way.

I don't know what else to say here, but that I am grateful. This is why it was the best.

Thank you.

Long weekend and Universal Studios with Mommy

I was not making plans to go out over the long weekend at all, but alas my plans were foiled by the long weekend. Totally wrecked my I-am-not-going-out-in-September plans. I am like flat broke for a variety of reasons. But anyway over the long weekend I caught up with some old friends, and it was always a great pleasure to do so.

Started with catching up with D. Haven't seen her for almost half a year, so it was awesome to just meet and chat and had the most thoughtful service @ The Handburger, Raffles City. They sorta forgot the order, and checked on us after realizing. Aside from making sure that our food came pronto, they not only waived off the service charge, but gave us a 10% discount on top of that. Talk about being thoughtful.

the handburger with pesto mushroom

chocolate affrogato @ TCC for desserts

And on Friday was my friends whom I didn't get to see for awhile, and KTV didn't happen because HY had to go back and take care of J =(

Most pleasant surprise came in the form of a call with news of free tickets to Universal Studios on Saturday, complete with meal vouchers and retail vouchers. So despite my earlier quarrel with mommy, I was sorta excited to go out with her.

Mom and I have our silly tiffs and fights all the time, but I love her dearly. And its been a while since I've gone out with her, so we quickly finished what we had to do, put on our summer clothes and went to Sentosa. It was quite a lot of fun really. We even took a roller coaster. Mommy was so scared though. She kept her eyes closed and held on to my arms so tightly.

ABSOLUTELY worth mentioning is Steven Spielberg's Lights, Camera, Action. They showed us how they recreate special effects in the studio, and the special effect in question is a Category 4 hurricane in New York. It was quite awesome and amazing I must say. The lights and sounds and fire and water and wind really took my breath away. Not going to bore with the little details but I think these little family moments remind me of how blessed I am.

Like how seeing my little brother all grown up and entering NS, and us having a nice family dinner together right before he enters. Also seeing A's family having a feast at the same time, adds that loving warm touch. I guess when we all grow up, its so easy to just neglect the family, always thinking that they will always be around. In life, there is really little room for neglect. I am glad that instead of sticking to my original plan, this kismet of an event happened and I spent it with mommy.

Hopefully there'll be more family time with the rest of them. Remember to show your appreciation for the ones you love =)

I like my shelf

I don't know why but I quite like my shelf. I like to look at it, and take photos of it =)

So August has come and gone, and we're now in September. I have had nothing much to say here on the blog, because words are kept well hidden. Certain things don't really deserve to be said too. And certain things should be better left unsaid.

Life's been great actually. I'm always a year into my work, and I'm very happy with everything. 2010 seems to be building up to be a good year, much better than 2009 was. Well actually it was just the ending of 2009 that was bad. I am really hoping that this Christmas/Boxing Day will be good - for all those who are NOT in the know, Boxing day and I are NOT friends. I'll leave it as such until Boxing Day, and then I'll write a blog post about it.

I'll also be travelling again, YAY =). To my favouritest Asian city, i.e., Taipei. Will be travelling with Jem, Dan, Sarah and Taxi. I love my holidays. Yeah I know I never posted the pictures of my previous Taipei trip, but hey if you're on my facebook, you'll get to see it.

IF you really want to see it here, just ask.

the price of admission

I wish I can describe this video, but I can't. It takes the words out of my very mouth. Its 5 minutes, but this will be the best 5 minutes ever spent in your life

The Person

"I want a person who will belong to me and me only, to escape life with, and I want to learn everything from him, about him, his joys, his fears, family, childhood stories, the sequence he takes in the shower, whether he brushes his teeth as he shampoos (like I do). I want to have to change the code on my iPhone lock and only tell him, for us to be strangers to the world except to each other. I want someone whom I can trust with the absolute weaknesses of mine that I can barely admit even to myself, and make me feel less alone for it. I want a hand I can put anything in, including my own. I want to never have to fear losing this person. And I would devote myself wholly to him."

Forget

The chinese character for "forget" is 忘, which is made up of death 亡 and heart 心 - a very apt combination because to forget, we need to kill our heart.

Back in Sunny Singapore

Well it is not exactly sunny right now, even the wintry melbourne proves to be sunnier and of more pleasant weather. If I had someone to cuddle, that would make it perfect.

I've got some good news, that is in the form of no more exclamation marks for all you readers, because my exclamation mark key is spoiled, together with the tab button and the number "one". Yeah I'll let you know what happen you meet me, so ask me. But I guess its good, since I get too excited often, and end up bombarding readers with excessive exclamation marks.

So I'm in a very good place right now, and all's very well. Why haven't I write more then? Well sometimes its really because I am wondering how to balance what I feel inside and not revealing too much. Because I really wear my heart on my sleeves, and my emotions are out for the world to see, but at the same time I wear a smile to mask emotions that I otherwise might not want people to know. Its not that hard to be happy really, you just got to be.

I guess very soon again, I write more from my heart, and right now, I'll just be skimming the surface. But then again, if you know me, you'll probably know it anyway. And if you don't, then I am keeping a healthy sense of mystery aren't I?

I'm tired now, but I'm really looking forward to next week, and yeah folks, its TGIF already. So enjoy and some nice melbourne shots from my last few days will be up shortly.

=D

I love melbourne!

And the weather is perfect yesterday!! Took a walk down to Animal Orchestra to have their soup! Which is of course great as always!

(don't you just love these hole in the wall establishments?)

(chicken, barley and corn soup)

And the perfect day made me decide to go on a walk. I really enjoy walking around Melbourne, simply because the weather is so awesome, and there's so many pretty places to walk to and just enjoy my company. So I wandered around until I reached the park beside the Melbourne Museum, a place we always walked passed. So pretty!

Happy day!

Lisa Loeb - Falling in Love

The time between meeting and finally leaving is sometimes called falling in love



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W_uG6Fnl4W0

I've got no words left to say

so I think I'll leave everyone with a song.




those memories I will cherish. thank you.

goodbye

rainbows

a friend of mine, R, said this on facebook, "If you want the rainbow, you must put up with the rain," and i thought i would share this with all of you.

robin and batman

was out walking around after yoga and saw the cutest tee shirt. robin and batman, k i s s i n g! wasn't quite expecting to see that in a place like Singapore, was more than pleasantly surprised. would have gotten it in a heartbeat, but the price tag of $49 meant that I should re-consider, afterall first jobbers ARE poorer than students.

and of course mommy who usually throws tantrums if i buy more than 1 top a month. yes i know i'm 26, but you don't know my mom.

sweet

desserts after lunch at candlenut, a new nonya restaurant near my workplace, which is unusual really, because i don't really like sweet things, i like bitter things. bitter coffee, bitter ice cream, and what have you. a friend once commented: "life is already bitter, why would want to make it bitter even with ice cream?"

so on this odd occasion, i decided to have something sweet.

Note to self:

I will be a good person with and be kind whenever I can.

I will not be angry and be patient in everything that I do.

My motivation will be respectable and not deplorable.

It's Sunday

And for that very few who now know, I hate sundays.

watch

These walls I've built

are so high and impenetrable, there's probably only one person with a higher wall that I know. And there's only one person who can make these walls come crashing down with only one look to my eyes.

My life thus far...

has been busy. Really busy because work's a very good distraction and a very excuse for everything else that I don't want to discuss, talk, or do. Its simple really. Just blame it on work. "I've gotta work," and its done. And truth to be told, I've really got to.

Because really, its just easier to run away and escape. Why even bother to deal with it. We all know what is the life of a gay men:

Teenage years: Fall head over heels in love many times

20s: Continuing falling in and out of love, but getting so jaded

30s: Work so hard and then wonder why we are working so hard for

40s: Feeling all empty and lonely

50s: Be the rich god father and uncles to our fag hag's daughter

60s - 70s: Wait to die lonely, no kids, no friends, no family left. At least let me die with dignity and not be shitting in my pants without any control.

So if I know that is what's coming up, I should just save myself the heartache. Why bother right? So here's to working my ass off and dying of exhaustion and getting all the material things that I want. At least you know that physical material products last longer than human love.

Salut!

which we all know its french for hi! =)

So today, we went to sign up for our French lesson! So excited about this. I'll be on the beginners class and this will be once a week, 3 hour per lesson for 8 weeks. And there'll be a test at the end. So hopefully in a years time, after like 6 modules or something like that, I will be able to understand and speak some basic french.

Watch out France!!!

New layout

Like FINALLY! Are you sick and tired of the old blog layout and the lack of exciting updates?

I mean, it bores me to read it. I reckon my archives were much more interesting. Because its a place where my memories are kept. And now looking back at them, it fills with me with nostalgia. To know just what my life was like. Things I remember, things I don't.

Life.

我爱台北，台北爱我！

I went to Taipei, and boy did I love that place! And here's a preview till I get sometime to update with more photos.

{Coffee at 西门丁, they won Taiwan's coffee competition!}

那就这样吧

新年快乐！

Its Chinese New Year! Its kinda my favourite time of the year, because its a time for family. Its also a time where I actually get to clean my room! And make everything nice and pretty. But ok, I am honestly a lot less superficial than that.

This CNY was spent with the usual reunion dinner at my gramps. Its always nice to see grandma, and I should really make an effort to visit at least once a month. For all the volunteer work that I do, I sure should also visit my grandma! She's getting on her years and her eyesight is not doing as well anymore. I will cherish all the time that I have and visit. What was the slightly more disappointing thing, is that reunion dinner is no longer something the extended family look towards. I still remember when I was a kid, I really looked forward to visiting my grandparents, but as we grew older, things changed.

I can't really pinpoint what happened, but I suppose a great deal had to do with 2 of my relatives having gone through a divorce, well technically one, but the other family is very dysfunctional and estranged from us. The family that has been through the divorce is still very close to our family, which is very heartening. But I suppose as we grew older, we all began to lead our own lives, and the increasingly infrequent meet-ups drifted us apart.

But its funny really, because I am much closer to my god-cousins. Maybe because our background are more similar? Or that we don't have the "burden" of being real cousins? I am not sure. I am only close to one of my real cousins. We hang out now and then, we share secrets, and just muse about life in general, and its all good. But of course there has been disappointing moments in all familial relationships, but that of course won't be shared here.

This new year, I went back to Malaysia to visit my maternal side of the family, and I must say that this is one of the best trips I've had so far. I am not really close to my maternal cousins at all, because we were brought up in very different background. But I think things are improving, we are getting closer, and my Aunt has become more sincere over the years. We even had a ton of fun at KTV, singing and drinking away. How AWESOME is that? I must say that for once, I look forward to heading back.

To end, here's a snap of me in my lovely New Year Clothes!!

I've got the new Facebook layout!!

And January 2010 is over

just like that. Its unbelievable actually, how fast life zooms by especially when one gets into the rat race of life. I can't remember when or how, but slowly, i feel less and less of a want to put down my thoughts. even on my paper diary. it just sorta happened. Even as I am typing this. I wonder, why do i not keep it all inside, why should I even record my thoughts. But these things its hard to say really. I enjoy reading all my old post, cause I like to look back, and read what I was thinking back in the days. What were my motivations, who I was, how much have I changed, have i grown. All this questions, my little blog here documents. All these answers, my little blog here reveals.

To me, as much as to you my (very few) dear readers.

So the cumulation of many events had led me think about life, and what exactly do I want in life. I had a revelation recently, that I am more competitive than ambitious. And that is not good, because my motivation is thus more external than internal. That all that i work hard to is so that I can be better than someone else. Instead I should be more ambitious, in that I make goals that I want myself to achieve, and not because I am comparing against someone else.

Which led me to think, what do I really want for myself? Somewhere along life, I got lost, and now I think i am even more lost than when I began. I have always been filled with lofty ambitions and ideals. Dreams that are so big I believe that I can change the world. If you remember not too long ago, the series of events that I was involved in.

But what about now?

I can't seem to see beyond the immediate few years. I suddenly totally know all the material things that I want, I can tell you exactly! But why have I become like that? I secretly know why. Why suddenly its all about the money. Why I am so hung up about it. Now that I know it, I need to do something about it. Because its not right. Its not right to be comfortable. I need to remind myself how upset i feel everytime I come back to this country.

This country that breaks my heart, that everywhere I look, i see prisons. People being imprisoned by a comfortable life, with no other wants, no other dreams. Nothing. HDB, 2 kids and a car. Period. That thought scares me.

If only it is enough to scare me to do something about it.

The Broken Road

Been listening to the piano version over and over, and I remembered you sent me this song, to let me know that the road to each other was tough and filled with many obstacles, but we found each other. We could finally stop looking around and now we could rest and rely on each other.

We've had great times and not so great times. Life's a marathon, and all the not-so-good times are there to make us tougher, so that we can weather bigger storms together. As long as I am holding your hands, I know even the harshest weather, we can face them head on.

Reading back our blog, from the first post of the time capsule till now, I never forgot how and why I fell in love with you, and how and why you fell in love with me. I will find the strength to keep me going, and the strength to be your pillar that you can rely on. And as and when I don't have the strength anymore, at least we have each other to lean on, and that will be infallible. Like the letter A. If you look at it carefully, its 2 pillar leaning on each other, holding hands.


The original song:

”一定会是我“

你说听了歌，会哭。但是我说我没有。就算有，也不会让你知道。

你说：“可惜不是你”，我却偷偷的说：“一定会是我”。

牵了你那小小的手，也牵了4年了。你的好，你的坏，你的美，你的不完美，我还不了解吗？我也很清楚知道你是多么的了解我。我懂你知道，但我不懂你懂我知道吗？

有哭吗？我说我没有。你懂我有吗？

我好想好想好想你。也是多么多么的爱你。你快点把该做的事做完，把论文写好，赶快回来。因为你深爱的男孩已经不行了，他想你想到都不能呼吸了。

“一定会是我，一定会是我“

想念是会呼吸的痛

After a very hard day at work, I just want to come home and see you. But you are not here anymore. I haven't seen your face for almost a month now. How are you?

The past few weeks have been crazy, and I just want to tell you that I've been a good boy. I want to tell you that I've been taking care of myself, I have been having my meals, though not always on time. I had a haircut today and it looks very nice. There are so many more things I want to share with you.

I miss you so much, I miss just being able to call you at the end of the day to talk to you, and have a chat. I miss just seeing your face and your smiles. I miss just being together with you.

I believe love can move the mountains.

I Love You. The you with all the your flaws, all of our differences, and everything else.

sometimes

Just staring at your presence is enough.

Your Love

This is such a sweet post, stolen off a junior's blog.

#####

If you see your love everyday
Make every moment special
Don't get bored

If you don't have a love
It's not because you aren't hot
Wait for the right TA

If you only get your love on weekends
Phone-kiss him on Monday
Shag him on Sunday

If your love is silly and doesn't get you
Be determined and get her to change
Let go when she stops trying

If your love has a big ego
Leave him
It doesn't compensate for his small dick

If your love lives a different life from you
Don't fight about things that made you
Make her build the future with you

If your love makes you a meal at 3AM
He'll need to stay in bed till 4PM
Perfect excuse to reward him with action between sheets before nightfall

If your love is fat and unwilling to run
Don't watch porn
Screw her hot best friend

If your love goes camping at Ubin with you
And she absolutely hates creepy crawlies
Make her laugh and scream when you see one

If your love is 10 732km away
You've beaten the odds by finding him
The fairytale ending is yours

If your love forgives you
Kiss him till his lips are numb
He's decided his pain is nothing compared to your love

If your love loves you
Like no one ever would
Don't ever let go