go read this taken from the straits times. its rather interesting


Just because there is no major crisis such as adultery or abuse doesn't mean that a relationship is a good one.

Very often, it is what my friend calls the 'stealth problems' that end up choking love.

'It's not like a heart attack that gets your attention right away, but a cancer that eats away at your body without you realising.

'That's where the danger lies, because you will brush aside the little aches and pains until it's too late, like when you get married, and things become unbearable with no way out.'

snippets of the article.
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just came back from a little nights out with him. went for an incredible food binging session, ate "ba chor mee", fried oysters, satay, and bbq chicken wing. yes between the 2 of us. hahaha, i am going to grow fat because of him.

the article above really sums up one i feel is the building block of a successful relationship, or as damien puts it, the denominator : communication. when there is any small problem, it cannot be brushed aside, nor swept under the carpet, because one day, it will find its way back during a major argument. one party will bring up something from the past. communication i feel is the most important; even though it might be uneasy or even tense up the relationship at that point in time, talking it out and discussing it openly and honestly will make both party see another view point and help to meet at a centre point. i admit that me and him are not exactly the best couple, we have communication problems now and then; but only because we are afraid what we say will hurt each other. and we are trying to move out of that mindset to that of saying what we feel using the correct words because we are trying every day to make it work.

it was a long ride home, and many things are on my mind. and i realised so many things that i didn't see in the past that some people warned me of. thanks guys, and i know this one is different, i am sure you all can see it and feel it too =) lets face it, gay relationships are difficult, but i am not one that quits especially in the fields of love, i am sure most you know that by now. even if it takes all of me, i will make it last.