Sep 8, 2007
Sep 7, 2007
Sep 5, 2007
i m freaking stressed and busy too
and finally at 130am, i am done with all my stuff. and i din even have personal time! i am off to bed because tomorrow is another long day. good night folks
Sep 1, 2007
Aug 31, 2007
random pictures
this sign is in NTU, yeah NTU has HORRIFIC spelling.
yeah i noe its gross right!!!!!! its my neighbour's cactus
Aug 28, 2007
its almost 1am
its been like sooooooo long since i am still up at 1am rushing my work. gosh! and i was just blogging about how we used to do that. the irony of life.
well if 1am sounds early to you, i wake up at about 7.30 to 8 daily. yeah even on weekends. so that should put things into perspective. ever since jem happened! i've been sleeping at about 11ish. melbourne is 2 hours ahead (or 3 if its daylight saving)
too much work too much work
HELP
well if 1am sounds early to you, i wake up at about 7.30 to 8 daily. yeah even on weekends. so that should put things into perspective. ever since jem happened! i've been sleeping at about 11ish. melbourne is 2 hours ahead (or 3 if its daylight saving)
too much work too much work
HELP
Aug 25, 2007
Aug 22, 2007
我要的只是你在我身边
school somehow drains me. i sleep well, i get about 7 to 8 hours daily i wake up bright and early at 8am mostly. but school takes it toll on me. i get rather tired by the end of the day that i don't feel like partaking in much activities.
school is picking up and going to be incredibly busy. many research to do. much more projects on my lap than i can perhaps handle and i still have to make time for tuition and some freelance work (hey they pay the bills) in between all this there are still much more administrative stuff to do.
i fondly remember a conversation with one of my old project group mate that it seems that CS students are just like that. this is of course not discounting our 'darling' engineers or what have you. but oftentimes CS students just seems to have so many things on our plate, of course i am generalizing here, but really. some people even handle volunteer work and dance classes and all. and we pull through.
but sometimes i wonder how we pull through. late nights in schools for projects, for chitchat, for studying. rushing madly to finish up editing, then rushing home for dinner. the days! gosh.
i have 3 massive projects, one of which involves a 40 page, 10'000 word report (this excludes references, tables, graphs) another involves many pages and a physical campaign, 2 research papers for professor. did i mention my freelance work??????
school is picking up and going to be incredibly busy. many research to do. much more projects on my lap than i can perhaps handle and i still have to make time for tuition and some freelance work (hey they pay the bills) in between all this there are still much more administrative stuff to do.
i fondly remember a conversation with one of my old project group mate that it seems that CS students are just like that. this is of course not discounting our 'darling' engineers or what have you. but oftentimes CS students just seems to have so many things on our plate, of course i am generalizing here, but really. some people even handle volunteer work and dance classes and all. and we pull through.
but sometimes i wonder how we pull through. late nights in schools for projects, for chitchat, for studying. rushing madly to finish up editing, then rushing home for dinner. the days! gosh.
i have 3 massive projects, one of which involves a 40 page, 10'000 word report (this excludes references, tables, graphs) another involves many pages and a physical campaign, 2 research papers for professor. did i mention my freelance work??????
Aug 18, 2007
Aug 16, 2007
Aug 15, 2007
what about me?
what about me?
#####
a blog i read said something and i thought that it is indeed so true:
"It’s scary how fast change is today. Yesterday i can say i love you, today i can scream at you for the slightest stupid mistake you made. I even saw people’s feelings change towards each other within hours. It’s alarming, i’d say. I saw how a promise made 24 years ago turn into dust as time rubs away traces of those words uttered. It’s sad, to say the least."
#####
there are some emails that i receive that i appreciate:
If we died tomorrow, the company
that we are working for could easily replace us in
a matter of days.
But the loved ones we left behind will feel the loss
for the rest of their lives.
And come to think of it, we pour ourselves more
into work than into our own loved ones,
an unwise investment indeed,
don't you think?
#####
a blog i read said something and i thought that it is indeed so true:
"It’s scary how fast change is today. Yesterday i can say i love you, today i can scream at you for the slightest stupid mistake you made. I even saw people’s feelings change towards each other within hours. It’s alarming, i’d say. I saw how a promise made 24 years ago turn into dust as time rubs away traces of those words uttered. It’s sad, to say the least."
#####
there are some emails that i receive that i appreciate:
If we died tomorrow, the company
that we are working for could easily replace us in
a matter of days.
But the loved ones we left behind will feel the loss
for the rest of their lives.
And come to think of it, we pour ourselves more
into work than into our own loved ones,
an unwise investment indeed,
don't you think?
Aug 12, 2007
its been awhile
hey all of you. its been awhile hasn't it? I've back safe and sound. the qantas flight back was much better than the flight there! there's quite a few things that i want to say but i am just deprived of energy to sit down and blog about it properly.
i'm good. how's everyone???
love to all, and especially you.
i'm good. how's everyone???
love to all, and especially you.
Aug 9, 2007
oh, its national day.
its just another day where we raise our leaders on a pedestal and go on endlessly about our motherland and what a long way we've come. together with synchronized dances and parades and a show of might. oh well.
in other news, did anyone catch those snippets of north korea where their dear leader is standing watching the troops march past and despite having such immense famine, they spend so much money celebrating with dances and parades and all??
in other news, did anyone catch those snippets of north korea where their dear leader is standing watching the troops march past and despite having such immense famine, they spend so much money celebrating with dances and parades and all??
Aug 1, 2007
Jul 25, 2007
follow the rotating pink dots
[ps: click on the image to load it fully after reading the instructions! you won't miss out, trust me]
If your eyes follow the movement of the rotating pink dot, the dots will remain
only one color, pink.
However if you stare at the black " + " in the center, the moving dot turns to green.
Now, concentrate on the black " + " in the center of the picture. After a short period, all the pink dots will slowly disappear, and you will only see only a single green dot rotating.
Jul 24, 2007
10 more days
before i have to face up to reality and take the long dreaded journey alone, back.
back to my bed. back to where you become a virtual reality for me.
back to my bed. back to where you become a virtual reality for me.
Jul 16, 2007
Jul 5, 2007
scandals of the $ingapore government!
we all know about our government and their thinly veiled attempt to cover their asses. they have gone one step further!
Prison authorities withheld letter from man given extra strokes
The ministries have basically ignored calls for explanations or given vague and non-enlightening answers to issues such as:
1. The termination of playwright Alfian Sa’at’s position as a relief teacher in a secondary school.
2. The losses incurred in the UNSW debacle
3. The losses incurred in the Shin Corp saga
4. How ex-NKF chairman Richard Yong managed to give the authorities the slip and abscond
5. Investments of the GIC
6. The 5 day work week issue, particularly for teachers
7. Why the EDB was never audited by the Auditor General for 46 years before this year
8. Why are all voting sheets indexed?
9. Why do people who voted for the opposition party gets visit from the PAP
10. Why when shop-owner in opposition estate voice disagreement about PAP, they get their license revoked coincidentally?
FUCK lah. democracy leads the the tyranny of the majority. what about people like me who don't even get to vote! why? what about people who CHOSE that do not want such a tyrannical and opaque government.
the usual, read the online citizen
Prison authorities withheld letter from man given extra strokes
The ministries have basically ignored calls for explanations or given vague and non-enlightening answers to issues such as:
1. The termination of playwright Alfian Sa’at’s position as a relief teacher in a secondary school.
2. The losses incurred in the UNSW debacle
3. The losses incurred in the Shin Corp saga
4. How ex-NKF chairman Richard Yong managed to give the authorities the slip and abscond
5. Investments of the GIC
6. The 5 day work week issue, particularly for teachers
7. Why the EDB was never audited by the Auditor General for 46 years before this year
8. Why are all voting sheets indexed?
9. Why do people who voted for the opposition party gets visit from the PAP
10. Why when shop-owner in opposition estate voice disagreement about PAP, they get their license revoked coincidentally?
FUCK lah. democracy leads the the tyranny of the majority. what about people like me who don't even get to vote! why? what about people who CHOSE that do not want such a tyrannical and opaque government.
the usual, read the online citizen
Jun 29, 2007
Jun 21, 2007
the only way
i think the only way for any of us to feel better, and to stop feeling like a lesser citizen is to not see singapore as a country. but rather to see singapore as $ingapore. $ingapore is a business. As a thriving business, $ingapore has to be cold, ruthless, heartless and uncaring. why should a business spend money on the poor, the elderly, and the handicap, they don't contribute to the business but they are COST. A good business must always minimize COST and maximize REVENUE and PROFIT.
so as a business, $ingapore cares the most for the upper and the middle-upper class because they contribute the most. and morales of the employees of a company you say? what better way to boost morale than to make them work longer hours so that they have no time to care about morale. if they don't work, they can't even survive.
exactly the makings of a good business.
so people, stop thinking of singapore as country and wonder when the government would do something for you. instead see $ingapore as a business and realize that everything is about money here. if foreigners are cheaper and can make the bottomline lower, well hello foreigner and get lost you supposed citizen.
suddenly i feel disgusted by our national anthem and all those songs we sing during national day. makes me want to boo it the next time it comes up.
so as a business, $ingapore cares the most for the upper and the middle-upper class because they contribute the most. and morales of the employees of a company you say? what better way to boost morale than to make them work longer hours so that they have no time to care about morale. if they don't work, they can't even survive.
exactly the makings of a good business.
so people, stop thinking of singapore as country and wonder when the government would do something for you. instead see $ingapore as a business and realize that everything is about money here. if foreigners are cheaper and can make the bottomline lower, well hello foreigner and get lost you supposed citizen.
suddenly i feel disgusted by our national anthem and all those songs we sing during national day. makes me want to boo it the next time it comes up.
moment of the day
this gets filed in the moment of the day, or bimbotic moment #n... except it wasn't done by ME!! hahaha guess who was the one, come on. hahaha
so we were in the lab today where he had to scan in this document, and after a few scans, the scans juts did not get through, so we concluded that perhaps the scanner is spoiled and decided to take out the document to change computer only to realize that there was no document there after all.
hahahaha. sounds like something I would do??? who are you kidding!!!!
in other news, melbourne is SOOOO COLD, i am freezing my ass off. it is 8 degrees here in the DAY, but the windchill factor makes it feel like 3 degrees (according to www.accuweather.com)
so we were in the lab today where he had to scan in this document, and after a few scans, the scans juts did not get through, so we concluded that perhaps the scanner is spoiled and decided to take out the document to change computer only to realize that there was no document there after all.
hahahaha. sounds like something I would do??? who are you kidding!!!!
in other news, melbourne is SOOOO COLD, i am freezing my ass off. it is 8 degrees here in the DAY, but the windchill factor makes it feel like 3 degrees (according to www.accuweather.com)
Jun 18, 2007
Snow Patrol - Chasing Cars
9 more hours before i board the plane, 16 more before i see you again. and here is where it all started
Jun 16, 2007
"If you care too much about Singapore, first it’ll break your spirit, and finally it will break your heart."
"If you care too much about Singapore, first it’ll break your spirit, and finally it will break your heart." - Alfian Saat
and the saddest part about that is that it is true, most true. whenever i have conversations with my friends, close ones or otherwise, the most often heard remark to my concerns are "why do you care, there is nothing that you can do anyway." and indeed no matter how much the government tries to pull any wool over our eyes that we can make a difference, we all know that nothing we do can change anything.
like mr wang said, does anyone sincerely believe that our government is working for our good? we have to pay them millions to make them work, not because they are patriotic and genuinely want to make things better.
in fact, the most depressing thing is that people whom sincerely wants to make singapore place will be crushed, in one way or another. and when you get past the government, there's still the minority religious conservatives.
in so many ways i hate singapore. the only reason why i am even going to stay here is only because of my family and friends. singapore stifles you, makes your life unbreathable. holds you by the neck and demand that you be a good slave. a good dog. bark as you are commanded and your life will be good.
and our government still wonders why singaporeans are so apathetic. isn't this what they want? "yes sir yes sir 3 bags full"
and the saddest part about that is that it is true, most true. whenever i have conversations with my friends, close ones or otherwise, the most often heard remark to my concerns are "why do you care, there is nothing that you can do anyway." and indeed no matter how much the government tries to pull any wool over our eyes that we can make a difference, we all know that nothing we do can change anything.
like mr wang said, does anyone sincerely believe that our government is working for our good? we have to pay them millions to make them work, not because they are patriotic and genuinely want to make things better.
in fact, the most depressing thing is that people whom sincerely wants to make singapore place will be crushed, in one way or another. and when you get past the government, there's still the minority religious conservatives.
in so many ways i hate singapore. the only reason why i am even going to stay here is only because of my family and friends. singapore stifles you, makes your life unbreathable. holds you by the neck and demand that you be a good slave. a good dog. bark as you are commanded and your life will be good.
and our government still wonders why singaporeans are so apathetic. isn't this what they want? "yes sir yes sir 3 bags full"
Jun 12, 2007
new machines!!
staying up all night to read about updates from apple was seriously the most underwhelming event this year. i expected so much, but it was all nothing! but on the other hand, i've just ordered a BRAND NEW MACBOOK PRO! I'm so hoping it arrives before i fly off to see him =)
its a 15inch LED backlight LCD display
1440 X 990 pixels
2.2ghz Intel Core 2 Duo (Santa Rosa)
2gb @ 667mhz DDR2 RAM
128mb GeForce 8800M GT
160gb HDD
all of 2.5 kg, 1 inch thin AND 6 hours of battery life.
and he's got his hands on a iMac because his sony is aging!
i heart apple, but of course i heart jem more
Jun 11, 2007
the boyfriend
there always come a point in time when the boyfriend will reassess and reevaluate himself. its probably something everyone does at some point in their life, especially when it comes to planning and what the boyfriend can give. and at this point of time, the boyfriend might feel somewhat inadequate when he realizes that what he can give is far below what the other wants.definitely, these are indeed just all plans and things are all still far far away (c.f. shrek). but a chopard or a jaeger lecoultre is really quite far away from a tag heuer, which incidentally is still quite far away from casio.
of cos all these are just words and plans, and nothing may come to materialize, but the boyfriend would still be reevaluating himself. the boyfriend must be able to hold his own ground and be the best that he can be, if the best is only a tag heuer.
because the boyfriend knows that he is loved for being the boyfriend, and not for the chopard, jaeger lecoultre or tag heuer, or even just a casio.
Jun 9, 2007
Jun 4, 2007
the fallacies of a supposed infallible government; RETURN ME MY $6.2 MILLION
i think we all know how i feel about our government. we should give credit where it is due, but when there are mistakes, it should be out in the open for public scrutiny, no one is immune. we are all human, and we are all fallible. what you are going to read below, is the absolute truth.
According to the Auditor General Office (AGO), the recent audit of our statutory board and 12 ministries revealed a loss of $6.2 MILLION of public monies, that is still unaccounted for.
This does not take into account the outstanding sum under the Ministry of Health: $136.2 MILLION for Phase III of the National University Hospital development project has still not been recovered despite having been completed in 1996.
Nor does it include the Ministry of Home Affairs which charged rental far below the market rate, forgoing $2.38 MILLION that should have gone into state coffers.
you can read the full report here:
part 1
part 2
part 3
part 4
Trying to say an opinion without getting my ass sued off is going to be quite a challenge. Can i get sued for saying that? Probably not. Hopefully not.
From the above reports, and the fact that EDB underwent its FIRST audit in FORTY SIX years (yes you read right), it leaves much more questions than anything the government can throw up. How can something like that happen in Singapore? When our ministers and supposed to be the best in the world (that's why we are paying them about 3 - 6 peanuts remember? - one peanut cost $600,000).
Naturally the STATE times did not carry this report. The state times reported on the Parliamentary debate on the Public Accounts Committee set to examine this AGO report. Why the state times did not get hold on the actual AGO report is still a question that no one can yet answer, and of course we must not speculate!
Of course this report is, as the AGO report said "not intended to reveal all errors and irregularities." This leaves the Singaporean wondering if there are any more errors? Aren't our ministers suppose to catch any inefficiency, or for that very matter, accounting problems? why is this the FIRST time EDB is undergoing audits in FORTY SIX BLOODY years. Isn't the government suppose to be accountable to the public? Aren't the government, the government for the people? WHY ARE SINGAPOREANS SO PASSIVE as to accept that the government is always right?
They are human and they will make mistakes. Are we still going to treat them like super-heroes in white, now that we know that $6.2 MILLION is MISSING and HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS of dollars are forfeited or not collected back into the state coffers.
Isn't it time we have proper checks and balances in the government, like more opposition party who would demand absolute transparency, or a press that would investigate and hold the government accountable. or at the very least PUBLISH SOME GOD-DAMN NEWS THAT MATTER!!!!!!
LIKE HOW HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS OF MY FUCKING TAX MONIES IS GONE THANKS TO OUR GOOD GOVERNANCE.
read the online citizen for a change.
According to the Auditor General Office (AGO), the recent audit of our statutory board and 12 ministries revealed a loss of $6.2 MILLION of public monies, that is still unaccounted for.
This does not take into account the outstanding sum under the Ministry of Health: $136.2 MILLION for Phase III of the National University Hospital development project has still not been recovered despite having been completed in 1996.
Nor does it include the Ministry of Home Affairs which charged rental far below the market rate, forgoing $2.38 MILLION that should have gone into state coffers.
you can read the full report here:
part 1
part 2
part 3
part 4
Trying to say an opinion without getting my ass sued off is going to be quite a challenge. Can i get sued for saying that? Probably not. Hopefully not.
From the above reports, and the fact that EDB underwent its FIRST audit in FORTY SIX years (yes you read right), it leaves much more questions than anything the government can throw up. How can something like that happen in Singapore? When our ministers and supposed to be the best in the world (that's why we are paying them about 3 - 6 peanuts remember? - one peanut cost $600,000).
Naturally the STATE times did not carry this report. The state times reported on the Parliamentary debate on the Public Accounts Committee set to examine this AGO report. Why the state times did not get hold on the actual AGO report is still a question that no one can yet answer, and of course we must not speculate!
Of course this report is, as the AGO report said "not intended to reveal all errors and irregularities." This leaves the Singaporean wondering if there are any more errors? Aren't our ministers suppose to catch any inefficiency, or for that very matter, accounting problems? why is this the FIRST time EDB is undergoing audits in FORTY SIX BLOODY years. Isn't the government suppose to be accountable to the public? Aren't the government, the government for the people? WHY ARE SINGAPOREANS SO PASSIVE as to accept that the government is always right?
They are human and they will make mistakes. Are we still going to treat them like super-heroes in white, now that we know that $6.2 MILLION is MISSING and HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS of dollars are forfeited or not collected back into the state coffers.
Isn't it time we have proper checks and balances in the government, like more opposition party who would demand absolute transparency, or a press that would investigate and hold the government accountable. or at the very least PUBLISH SOME GOD-DAMN NEWS THAT MATTER!!!!!!
LIKE HOW HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS OF MY FUCKING TAX MONIES IS GONE THANKS TO OUR GOOD GOVERNANCE.
read the online citizen for a change.
May 31, 2007
happy
only you can make me smile like a silly nut! and make me so happier, that i can only wonder how much happier i can be, but you surprise me each and everything.
=)
=)
May 28, 2007
of regrets and a tuition kid
i really hate phone calls after 11pm (or so) and before i wake up. actually in the first hour of my waking up, i do not quite enjoy my phone ringing as well. understandably, this is compounded by the fact that my handphone has a really loud ring tone. i don't quite like phone calls at such time, because these times are rather private to me. after 11pm its essentially my time, and time with jem, and of course sleep is sleep, and right when i wake up i just want some private time to do my morning routine.
so horror of horror when today at 738 am, right when i woke up, i received a phone call from my tuition kid's mom. now we all know how i feel about her, and her absolute refusal to pay a poor student on time. apparently her son asked why does he need tuition even in the holidays, and she is concerned because she wants him to do well, and not later on in life regret that he did not have enough tuition.
seriously.
who would ever later on in their life regret that they do not have enough tuition? there are many things to regret, like not studying hard enough, or not putting in that extra effort. but not having enough tuition? that's quite new. so now aside from being their tutor in english math and science. i have to teach chinese, help out with art, burn CD for the mother and now the resident family therapist/counsellor. i'm not even going to tell you how pathetically i am paid.
speaking about regrets, something i've read on mr wang really made me think. he was talking about his career as a lawyer then and his kids. he quit his job as a lawyer despite liking what he does because of his children. he said:
"Then my first child was born. Six months later, I quit the job. Mrs Wang quit private practice too. The kind of work/family balance we wanted was not going to happen, in a law firm environment.
I had absolutely no regrets. If I thought only in terms of the cost to my career, I would have had regrets. But the wiser thing to do was to consider life as a total package. I looked at my life as a whole, and the correct decision became quite clear to me. So I left private practice without hesitation, quite happily, and much to the dismay of my then-bosses. And I haven't looked back."
indeed many times in life, almost everything is an either-or situation, an opportunity cost. if we do something we have to forfeit something. and sometimes there are regrets. but there are certain things we never regret. nobody, 20 years down in their career would regret putting aside their career for their family. in the bigger picture, it does not matter how much we've put into a career, because there's no end to that, but time never turns back. time lost with your children/family/loved ones is forever lost. one can go about with their career thinking that when everything is settled and their career has taken off then they can spend time with their family, but they never do.
because the higher one gets in their career, the busier they get. and the day they want to spend with their loved ones may never come to materialize. maybe the kids grew up, maybe family members passed away, or maybe their loved ones are just too old to partake in all the activities that they've always wanted.
have no regrets my friend. always think about what is most important to you. if money is most important, more important than your children/family/loved ones, then you know what you must do. but remember, certain things will always be around, certain things will never be.
#####
Sil: thanks for your comment, its been noted and i will address it in the next posting =) btw, do you want to introduce yourself?
so horror of horror when today at 738 am, right when i woke up, i received a phone call from my tuition kid's mom. now we all know how i feel about her, and her absolute refusal to pay a poor student on time. apparently her son asked why does he need tuition even in the holidays, and she is concerned because she wants him to do well, and not later on in life regret that he did not have enough tuition.
seriously.
who would ever later on in their life regret that they do not have enough tuition? there are many things to regret, like not studying hard enough, or not putting in that extra effort. but not having enough tuition? that's quite new. so now aside from being their tutor in english math and science. i have to teach chinese, help out with art, burn CD for the mother and now the resident family therapist/counsellor. i'm not even going to tell you how pathetically i am paid.
speaking about regrets, something i've read on mr wang really made me think. he was talking about his career as a lawyer then and his kids. he quit his job as a lawyer despite liking what he does because of his children. he said:
"Then my first child was born. Six months later, I quit the job. Mrs Wang quit private practice too. The kind of work/family balance we wanted was not going to happen, in a law firm environment.
I had absolutely no regrets. If I thought only in terms of the cost to my career, I would have had regrets. But the wiser thing to do was to consider life as a total package. I looked at my life as a whole, and the correct decision became quite clear to me. So I left private practice without hesitation, quite happily, and much to the dismay of my then-bosses. And I haven't looked back."
indeed many times in life, almost everything is an either-or situation, an opportunity cost. if we do something we have to forfeit something. and sometimes there are regrets. but there are certain things we never regret. nobody, 20 years down in their career would regret putting aside their career for their family. in the bigger picture, it does not matter how much we've put into a career, because there's no end to that, but time never turns back. time lost with your children/family/loved ones is forever lost. one can go about with their career thinking that when everything is settled and their career has taken off then they can spend time with their family, but they never do.
because the higher one gets in their career, the busier they get. and the day they want to spend with their loved ones may never come to materialize. maybe the kids grew up, maybe family members passed away, or maybe their loved ones are just too old to partake in all the activities that they've always wanted.
have no regrets my friend. always think about what is most important to you. if money is most important, more important than your children/family/loved ones, then you know what you must do. but remember, certain things will always be around, certain things will never be.
#####
Sil: thanks for your comment, its been noted and i will address it in the next posting =) btw, do you want to introduce yourself?
May 25, 2007
A case for fertilization techniques
I read with interest the recent events of a father raping his daughters, a teenage monster who molest and rape his victims; this even brings to mind the old case of Took Ah Hao and his victim Huang Na.
It is with great shock and disgust that I realized what our society has degenerated to, and in light of the recent debate on decriminalizing homosexuality, I feel that not only should we not decriminalize gay sex, we must also ban all forms of sex.
As we can see from all the above events, heterosexual sex is hedonistic and they even violate the modesty of the girls. Because of the want for sex, the criminals above resort to actions such as molest and even rape to satisfy their needs.
To put an end to all this moral problems, and to prevent the society from degenerating into one with no values other than to satisfy our lust, we must ban all forms of sex, putting it in line with penal code 377, where we give life imprisonment to anybody who wants to have sex, heterosexual or homosexual.
Scientific advancement have led to many successful fertilization technique, as such there is no excuse for having sex for procreation purposes, besides many people do not indulge in sexual activities for procreation purposes.
Singapore is conservative country and if we continue to allow heterosexual couples to have sex, I fear what might become of our society, what comes next after raping your own daughters? If we do not ban all forms of sexual activities, the society may be too dangerous for the next generation
It is with great shock and disgust that I realized what our society has degenerated to, and in light of the recent debate on decriminalizing homosexuality, I feel that not only should we not decriminalize gay sex, we must also ban all forms of sex.
As we can see from all the above events, heterosexual sex is hedonistic and they even violate the modesty of the girls. Because of the want for sex, the criminals above resort to actions such as molest and even rape to satisfy their needs.
To put an end to all this moral problems, and to prevent the society from degenerating into one with no values other than to satisfy our lust, we must ban all forms of sex, putting it in line with penal code 377, where we give life imprisonment to anybody who wants to have sex, heterosexual or homosexual.
Scientific advancement have led to many successful fertilization technique, as such there is no excuse for having sex for procreation purposes, besides many people do not indulge in sexual activities for procreation purposes.
Singapore is conservative country and if we continue to allow heterosexual couples to have sex, I fear what might become of our society, what comes next after raping your own daughters? If we do not ban all forms of sexual activities, the society may be too dangerous for the next generation
May 22, 2007
Homosexuality - why it should bother you
The most widely talked about topic in the recent weeks is something close to heart indeed. After Minister Mentor Lee made a statement that could be interpreted as either about removing laws that discriminate homosexuality or maintain status quo and not enforcing the current laws, the english speaking community went into a fury. Some are for equality for all, others like Jonathan, Agnes of course who can forget Yvonne Lee from NUS Law school (who is currently going through a tough period from a huge backlash) and others decided that homosexuals are less than human and they should be banished, if not continued to be illegal or a 'sub'-culture.
Now the most interesting thing is that when you look at both sides of the issues, there are far bigger implications and many logical fallacies. Why should we continue incriminating homosexuals? Well because the bible says so. Period. (for an in-depth read on homosexuality and christianity, this is a speech by Rev Dr Yap Kim Hao. I am no expert in Christianity, so I'll let the expert do the talking - please read that nette)
I wrote once about why religion should never be mixed into law. Some may argue that law came from religion, but i beg to differ. The premises of law came not only from religion, but along the way many other thinkers and philosophers and movements throughout history have shaped law. Obviously laws that came before the bible must have came from somewhere no? So to argue that law as we know of today descended from biblical interpretation, is as best being ethnocentric.
Religion should be removed from law simply because all religions are equal, why should we incriminate what one religion feels that is wrong onto others whom have no opinion. Simply stated, our Muslim brothers do not consume pork, should we then ban all pork? Hence the key word we are looking at is secularism, whereby policies and initiatives are created without religious biases.
After removing religion from the debate of homosexuality, we then come down to 2 other arguments, the medical argument, and the family values and society argument. Now proponents of the medical arguments are, ironically all christians! They claim that the American Psychological Association (APA) removed homosexuality as a disease back in the 70's due to pressure from the gay right movement. What they did not tell you is that later on in 1994, long after the gay rights movement, APA stood up and reasserted themselves that homosexuality is not a mental disease and they did not removed it due to pressure from gay groups.
The other medical argument would of course be the nature and nurture argument. The problem with this is that people who cite research do not know the basic premise of research, the double negative nature of research. As an example, if a group of scientist embark on a research to show the nature/biological causes of homosexuality, and they do not find support, it DOES NOT mean that therefore it proves the nurture argument. it simply means that in their sample population, they have not enough evidence to prove nature. period. that is all there is to it.
Furthermore holding a nature OR nurture view is highly simplistic. Research will show you that gender, intelligence, race are all nurture AND nature. Its a case of both because both are so highly intertwined that they cannot be separated, for every scientific research done on one, we can find another scientific research that shows the other, and that is the spirit of academia, to arrive at an eventual reasonable range of explanation.
Proponents of the medical argument will also often cite Dr Spritzer's research on reparative therapy proving that gay men can turn straight. Well I'll have you know that the very people who started this therapy ended up breaking away from the church after they were caught in gay bars and were publicized in the media as one big hypocrisy. Moving on the Dr Spritzer's research, his research was not to show that reparative therapy works on homosexual. Rather he gathered a group of homosexual who went through therapy (they were volunteers by the way) and then assessed them. Now this is a group motivated for change, 97% of them are of christian background, and 93% of them said that religion were extremely important to them. Now the study he did showed that TWO-THIRDS (63%) of this motivated group still had feelings towards the same gender. This figure is higher amongst gay men (at 86%). Even Dr Spritzer himself came up and expressed his disappointment at anti-gay religious groups misquoting his studies. One also must remember that Dr Spritzer himself was one of the instrumental figure who help in the declassification of homosexuality as a mental illness
Still on the case of medical arguments, recently Dr Alan Chin Yew Liang (i think that's his name) claimed that homosexuality is a disease because being homosexual shortens life-span, and by his definition of a disease, that its a condition that shortens life-span. Well it must then surprise all of us than being male is a disease, and being left handed is a disease, and being members of different race is a disease then. As we all know, males have shorter life expectancy than females, left-handed people live shorter than right handed people, members of different countries and race have different life expectancies. Furthermore, Dr Chin justified his conclusion by using a report that shows than being homosexual shortens life-span because of the high prevalence of HIV in this population. For my unbiased reader, it must be then obvious that it is HIV that is the disease that shortens the life-span and not homosexual. Going by Dr Chin's logic, heterosexual men whom visits prostitutes and have unprotected sex must then be a disease, since they are by far, the population with the highest prevalence of HIV.
Moving on from medical to family and society arguments. A very fascinating thing to note is that very definition of both ideas. It appears that for those anti-gay people, they assume that a family must comprise of a father, mother and children. And that if there were gay people around who are minding their own business and having sex with their own partners, somehow their family unit will fall apart. I am not quite following their logic, are you? What about single parent families then? What about unwed mothers then? How will their family fall apart? Definitions for family do not take into considerations culture as well, in many parts of the world, fathers and mothers do not look after their children, it is other members who do so; also what about families with adopted children? So what exactly is a family? Psychologist have seek to define family as a group of people who live together have established relationship and care for each other. You might also be interested to show that studies done, such as that by Tasker and Golombok (1997) shows that an overwhelming majority of children growing up in gay families have a heterosexual orientation.
How does families then fall apart? How does society fall apart?
The biggest misunderstanding is that society is an entity, that it exist as something concrete and thus can be destroyed. That is not the case, society exist because humans exists and there are interactions with one another. Because society always exist, because it is not an entity, it cannot be destroyed. For all those who say that if everyone is homosexual, there would be no society, here's Dr John Corvino's reply "with all due respect, if the whole world becomes roman catholic priest, there will be no society too". The case in point is that either society exist, or, when humans eventually become extinct, it does not exist. There's is no destroying of a society.
So why should it bother each and everyone of us? The very idea of tolerance, acceptance and love. At no point should we discriminate anyone because they are different. We have seen many of such instances in the past and even today. African Americans were overtly and very much discriminated against in the past, today such discrimination may not exist overtly, but implicit attitudes test measured still shows some form of discrimination. Gender discrimination was also something that existed and continue to exist, women were not able to attend institutes of higher educations, some are not even allowed to work in other countries. Even in home ground, despite what we would like to believe, discrimination against other races can be observed, such as sitting beside members of the same race when there are seats available besides members of different races as well.
Why should we fear people who are different?
Even if we can't change the fact that there will always be some form of discrimination, should we then inscribe in law that some groups are less equal than others and hence they should be discriminated. Some people might argue that majority of the population is not ready, but if we look closer, all major shifts in mindset happens at a time where 'majority of the people are not ready'. During the civil rights movement for the blacks, majority of the Southerners were not ready. I assure you that many men today still don't think women should have equal rights, but then should we use this and justify that women therefore should not have equal rights.
Furthermore, homosexuals in Singapore are not even asking for additional rights, not to be treated as special, but to be treated as human. That we have a right to love, and a right to express our love. Why should it be that an expression of love is as guilty as culpable homicide not amounting to murder? Why can't gay men love? There is absolutely no reason to deny anyone of a basic fundamental human rights of love and expression of love.
For anyone who wants to extend this to bestiality, pedophilia, necrophilia, or even screwing a tree, think again. The point here is that this is 2 consenting adults who can make their own choice, they are not forced. I don't really know how an animal, dead people or a tree can give their consent, please do enlighten me. As for pedophiles, we are not talking in the same league, because the law and the medical world assumes that children cannot make choices, hence everything a child does requires parental consent. This is also why children are considered juvenile and trial differently from logically reasoning adults.
It boils down to one thing, homosexuals are human, if we continue to discriminate against them, because anti-gay religious people dictates so, then where do we stop? who are we going to attack next? Are we going to discriminate against people who do not have the same religious inclination? Are we going to use an interpretation of a religious text and come up with new laws (this brings to mind the prohibition of alcohol in the US in the 70s). Homosexuals have been having sex since and will continue to have sex; homosexuals have loved each other and will continue to do so. Why should we then, decide that the lives of others are less worthy than ours, and deny them of their rights?
If we want to continue to incriminate them? What is next? Sexuality cleansing? Systematically murder all homosexuals?
What is next? Love for all? Compassion for all? Or a situation as Yvonne Lee fondly puts it, equality for all, but all means some.
word count: 1931 (as requested by alexis)
Now the most interesting thing is that when you look at both sides of the issues, there are far bigger implications and many logical fallacies. Why should we continue incriminating homosexuals? Well because the bible says so. Period. (for an in-depth read on homosexuality and christianity, this is a speech by Rev Dr Yap Kim Hao. I am no expert in Christianity, so I'll let the expert do the talking - please read that nette)
I wrote once about why religion should never be mixed into law. Some may argue that law came from religion, but i beg to differ. The premises of law came not only from religion, but along the way many other thinkers and philosophers and movements throughout history have shaped law. Obviously laws that came before the bible must have came from somewhere no? So to argue that law as we know of today descended from biblical interpretation, is as best being ethnocentric.
Religion should be removed from law simply because all religions are equal, why should we incriminate what one religion feels that is wrong onto others whom have no opinion. Simply stated, our Muslim brothers do not consume pork, should we then ban all pork? Hence the key word we are looking at is secularism, whereby policies and initiatives are created without religious biases.
After removing religion from the debate of homosexuality, we then come down to 2 other arguments, the medical argument, and the family values and society argument. Now proponents of the medical arguments are, ironically all christians! They claim that the American Psychological Association (APA) removed homosexuality as a disease back in the 70's due to pressure from the gay right movement. What they did not tell you is that later on in 1994, long after the gay rights movement, APA stood up and reasserted themselves that homosexuality is not a mental disease and they did not removed it due to pressure from gay groups.
The other medical argument would of course be the nature and nurture argument. The problem with this is that people who cite research do not know the basic premise of research, the double negative nature of research. As an example, if a group of scientist embark on a research to show the nature/biological causes of homosexuality, and they do not find support, it DOES NOT mean that therefore it proves the nurture argument. it simply means that in their sample population, they have not enough evidence to prove nature. period. that is all there is to it.
Furthermore holding a nature OR nurture view is highly simplistic. Research will show you that gender, intelligence, race are all nurture AND nature. Its a case of both because both are so highly intertwined that they cannot be separated, for every scientific research done on one, we can find another scientific research that shows the other, and that is the spirit of academia, to arrive at an eventual reasonable range of explanation.
Proponents of the medical argument will also often cite Dr Spritzer's research on reparative therapy proving that gay men can turn straight. Well I'll have you know that the very people who started this therapy ended up breaking away from the church after they were caught in gay bars and were publicized in the media as one big hypocrisy. Moving on the Dr Spritzer's research, his research was not to show that reparative therapy works on homosexual. Rather he gathered a group of homosexual who went through therapy (they were volunteers by the way) and then assessed them. Now this is a group motivated for change, 97% of them are of christian background, and 93% of them said that religion were extremely important to them. Now the study he did showed that TWO-THIRDS (63%) of this motivated group still had feelings towards the same gender. This figure is higher amongst gay men (at 86%). Even Dr Spritzer himself came up and expressed his disappointment at anti-gay religious groups misquoting his studies. One also must remember that Dr Spritzer himself was one of the instrumental figure who help in the declassification of homosexuality as a mental illness
Still on the case of medical arguments, recently Dr Alan Chin Yew Liang (i think that's his name) claimed that homosexuality is a disease because being homosexual shortens life-span, and by his definition of a disease, that its a condition that shortens life-span. Well it must then surprise all of us than being male is a disease, and being left handed is a disease, and being members of different race is a disease then. As we all know, males have shorter life expectancy than females, left-handed people live shorter than right handed people, members of different countries and race have different life expectancies. Furthermore, Dr Chin justified his conclusion by using a report that shows than being homosexual shortens life-span because of the high prevalence of HIV in this population. For my unbiased reader, it must be then obvious that it is HIV that is the disease that shortens the life-span and not homosexual. Going by Dr Chin's logic, heterosexual men whom visits prostitutes and have unprotected sex must then be a disease, since they are by far, the population with the highest prevalence of HIV.
Moving on from medical to family and society arguments. A very fascinating thing to note is that very definition of both ideas. It appears that for those anti-gay people, they assume that a family must comprise of a father, mother and children. And that if there were gay people around who are minding their own business and having sex with their own partners, somehow their family unit will fall apart. I am not quite following their logic, are you? What about single parent families then? What about unwed mothers then? How will their family fall apart? Definitions for family do not take into considerations culture as well, in many parts of the world, fathers and mothers do not look after their children, it is other members who do so; also what about families with adopted children? So what exactly is a family? Psychologist have seek to define family as a group of people who live together have established relationship and care for each other. You might also be interested to show that studies done, such as that by Tasker and Golombok (1997) shows that an overwhelming majority of children growing up in gay families have a heterosexual orientation.
How does families then fall apart? How does society fall apart?
The biggest misunderstanding is that society is an entity, that it exist as something concrete and thus can be destroyed. That is not the case, society exist because humans exists and there are interactions with one another. Because society always exist, because it is not an entity, it cannot be destroyed. For all those who say that if everyone is homosexual, there would be no society, here's Dr John Corvino's reply "with all due respect, if the whole world becomes roman catholic priest, there will be no society too". The case in point is that either society exist, or, when humans eventually become extinct, it does not exist. There's is no destroying of a society.
So why should it bother each and everyone of us? The very idea of tolerance, acceptance and love. At no point should we discriminate anyone because they are different. We have seen many of such instances in the past and even today. African Americans were overtly and very much discriminated against in the past, today such discrimination may not exist overtly, but implicit attitudes test measured still shows some form of discrimination. Gender discrimination was also something that existed and continue to exist, women were not able to attend institutes of higher educations, some are not even allowed to work in other countries. Even in home ground, despite what we would like to believe, discrimination against other races can be observed, such as sitting beside members of the same race when there are seats available besides members of different races as well.
Why should we fear people who are different?
Even if we can't change the fact that there will always be some form of discrimination, should we then inscribe in law that some groups are less equal than others and hence they should be discriminated. Some people might argue that majority of the population is not ready, but if we look closer, all major shifts in mindset happens at a time where 'majority of the people are not ready'. During the civil rights movement for the blacks, majority of the Southerners were not ready. I assure you that many men today still don't think women should have equal rights, but then should we use this and justify that women therefore should not have equal rights.
Furthermore, homosexuals in Singapore are not even asking for additional rights, not to be treated as special, but to be treated as human. That we have a right to love, and a right to express our love. Why should it be that an expression of love is as guilty as culpable homicide not amounting to murder? Why can't gay men love? There is absolutely no reason to deny anyone of a basic fundamental human rights of love and expression of love.
For anyone who wants to extend this to bestiality, pedophilia, necrophilia, or even screwing a tree, think again. The point here is that this is 2 consenting adults who can make their own choice, they are not forced. I don't really know how an animal, dead people or a tree can give their consent, please do enlighten me. As for pedophiles, we are not talking in the same league, because the law and the medical world assumes that children cannot make choices, hence everything a child does requires parental consent. This is also why children are considered juvenile and trial differently from logically reasoning adults.
It boils down to one thing, homosexuals are human, if we continue to discriminate against them, because anti-gay religious people dictates so, then where do we stop? who are we going to attack next? Are we going to discriminate against people who do not have the same religious inclination? Are we going to use an interpretation of a religious text and come up with new laws (this brings to mind the prohibition of alcohol in the US in the 70s). Homosexuals have been having sex since and will continue to have sex; homosexuals have loved each other and will continue to do so. Why should we then, decide that the lives of others are less worthy than ours, and deny them of their rights?
If we want to continue to incriminate them? What is next? Sexuality cleansing? Systematically murder all homosexuals?
What is next? Love for all? Compassion for all? Or a situation as Yvonne Lee fondly puts it, equality for all, but all means some.
word count: 1931 (as requested by alexis)
May 20, 2007
its been awhile
its been awhile since i've blogged, well what have i been up to? plenty! its the holidays but *drum roll* i am still studying and *more drum rolls please* i'm also working, freelance plus giving tuition. so that makes me busy. but the super busy week's over, and now its a short rest period, because next week i've got my presentationS, yeah that's plural for you. and then i've got 2 weeks break before my exam and then, and then.............. *one last drum roll* I AM OFF TO MELBOURNE to find you-know-who.
people whom are close to me would probably have heard me gripe about this, but for those who haven't, i have issues with people who don't pay up. and i have issues asking them to pay me! i suppose this is in part of perhaps a chinese culture. but then this leads to the question, what exactly is the chinese culture, or the 'asian value' argument put forth, and of course the favourite argument' of our ministers.
all chinese love money right? after all, 吃喝嫖赌 are the essence of what makes us chinese no? we want money, more money. everything we do is about money. so why do i feel difficult in opening my mouth to ask for what i rightfully deserve? i rendered my services, and i don't get paid on time, EVERY SINGLE TIME, because of. i mean how cash strapped can a family be, when they can afford a CAR, a MAID, DOUBLE WORKING PARENTS, and that they even want to hire bloody expensive tutors, but they can't afford to pay a poor student. bullocks i say.
honestly, i have many many things to say, especially recently there's been much debate and talk about issues close to heart, homosexuality, ministerial pay raise, possible bus fare hike (AGAIN!, yes i know, after posting RECORD PROFIT AGAIN!), GST hikes and all, but again i would say that i need time to sit down and write a proper entry, i've got work to do now, and i suppose that's the one thing our government tries to achieve, work all of us to death, such that we don't have the time to ever bother with these. after we all want money don't we?
what else in life is there that is more attractive than money? you tell me!
people whom are close to me would probably have heard me gripe about this, but for those who haven't, i have issues with people who don't pay up. and i have issues asking them to pay me! i suppose this is in part of perhaps a chinese culture. but then this leads to the question, what exactly is the chinese culture, or the 'asian value' argument put forth, and of course the favourite argument' of our ministers.
all chinese love money right? after all, 吃喝嫖赌 are the essence of what makes us chinese no? we want money, more money. everything we do is about money. so why do i feel difficult in opening my mouth to ask for what i rightfully deserve? i rendered my services, and i don't get paid on time, EVERY SINGLE TIME, because of
honestly, i have many many things to say, especially recently there's been much debate and talk about issues close to heart, homosexuality, ministerial pay raise, possible bus fare hike (AGAIN!, yes i know, after posting RECORD PROFIT AGAIN!), GST hikes and all, but again i would say that i need time to sit down and write a proper entry, i've got work to do now, and i suppose that's the one thing our government tries to achieve, work all of us to death, such that we don't have the time to ever bother with these. after we all want money don't we?
what else in life is there that is more attractive than money? you tell me!
May 18, 2007
S.H.E - 触电
风走在我们前面
甩裙摆画着圆圈
花美得兴高采烈
那香味有点阴险
你在我旁边的旁边
但影子却肩碰肩
偷看一眼
你的唇边
是不是也有笑意明显
明明是昨天的事情
怎么今天我还在经历
一丁点回忆都能惊天又动地
想问个愚蠢问题
我们再这样下去
你猜会走到哪里
但请你不要太快揭开还沉默的情话
先让我多着急一下再终于等到解答
太容易的爱故事就不耐人回味啦
像这样触电
就够我快乐熔化
我们就耐心培养萌芽不要急着开花
反正有长长的日记等我们去填满它
在被全世界发现以前先愉快装傻
就这样触电
一直甜蜜触电
直到爆炸
像一年四个季节
都被你变成夏天
我才会在你面前
总是被晒红了脸
像一百万个秋千
在我心里面叛变
被你指尖
碰到指尖
我瞬间就被荡到天边
May 6, 2007
Rain
i have always loved rainy days. when i was a little kid, i remember there was this really huge storm that turned the whole sky grey; i couldn't even see the trees in front of my house. but in the deep grey outdoors, there was this silhouette of a lone big tree. the picture was so beautiful. so sad, poignant yet of an unspoken beauty. Loneliness. creeping all over the tree. Solitude. somewhat a reflection of life. more often than not, we are with and by ourselves, we have to learn and stand up against the storm. in the end, its only you.
the tree survived that torrential downpour. but i saw no rainbow. the sky however, cleared up. rainbow doesn't always appear after a storm, but the storm always clears up eventually. even now, watching the raindrops fall from the sky still evokes many feelings. 伤感, because grey is a sad colour. lifeless. i have this romanticised notion of rain, standing by the big window watching the rain fall drop by drop, in the warm embrace of the one i love, listening to the slow and gentle music, saying "i love you" with the soul of my eyes. Silent.
30/01/02
the tree survived that torrential downpour. but i saw no rainbow. the sky however, cleared up. rainbow doesn't always appear after a storm, but the storm always clears up eventually. even now, watching the raindrops fall from the sky still evokes many feelings. 伤感, because grey is a sad colour. lifeless. i have this romanticised notion of rain, standing by the big window watching the rain fall drop by drop, in the warm embrace of the one i love, listening to the slow and gentle music, saying "i love you" with the soul of my eyes. Silent.
30/01/02
May 4, 2007
May 3, 2007
Apr 30, 2007
looks out agnes chua
there's a look that never fails to amuse CS students. the looks on the engineers face before their exams. its like one gigantic ball of stress. but come tomorrow morning, i'll be sporting that i'm-really-stress look. its so fashionable.
who is agnes you ask? she's this bitch on straits time forum page, after my exam tomorrow, i am writing an in-depth reply to her absolutely factually incorrect forum article.
i'll bitch slap till she sports my second favourite look. the i'm-the-loser-bitch look! WOHOOOOOOOO
19 more hours.
who is agnes you ask? she's this bitch on straits time forum page, after my exam tomorrow, i am writing an in-depth reply to her absolutely factually incorrect forum article.
i'll bitch slap till she sports my second favourite look. the i'm-the-loser-bitch look! WOHOOOOOOOO
19 more hours.
Apr 29, 2007
no life
guess what i was doing today?!?!?! the same that i do everyday, try and take over the world pinky!.... no not really, i've been studying in school, on a sunday! how depressing huh? and what is the worse thing, its statistics. statistics is not really that bad. really. i just HATE and abhor the manual calculating. its not like its damn easy lor. seriously, its like the moment i have one decimal wrong, my whole answer is wrong.
but of course i will persevere and pull through! after tomorrow, i will be free!!!! until thursday that is. tuition starts, and monday school reopens for me, who takes special semester just so i can clear modules for my double major. i have no life!!!
sigh.....
but of course i will persevere and pull through! after tomorrow, i will be free!!!! until thursday that is. tuition starts, and monday school reopens for me, who takes special semester just so i can clear modules for my double major. i have no life!!!
sigh.....
Apr 28, 2007
Apr 26, 2007
quote of today!
"make something idiot-proof, and they will build you a better idiot!"
edit: tag changed from humor to humour as per jiaz request. she kinda detest american spelling. but i am more with the americans on thru. seriously whats with through, repeat after me, rough... th-rough...
edit: tag changed from humor to humour as per jiaz request. she kinda detest american spelling. but i am more with the americans on thru. seriously whats with through, repeat after me, rough... th-rough...
Apr 24, 2007
MUST WATCH
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=6578225891784504536
this is sylvia lim in parliament. i can't seem to use google video to post it here, so click on the link and watch her debate on the pay rise, and watch as she dissects ministers argument to bits!
i can't really say much because i've got an exam to study for, and scholarship to apply for. but i wondered who thought of a pay rise? and makes me also wonder about our GST hike. and many many other things. but oh well
on another note, much love to ayline and zeeq for their comforting notes. yeah the paper is over! and many more to go. thanks for video ayline, i've watched it before, but it still made me smile =)
cheers
this is sylvia lim in parliament. i can't seem to use google video to post it here, so click on the link and watch her debate on the pay rise, and watch as she dissects ministers argument to bits!
i can't really say much because i've got an exam to study for, and scholarship to apply for. but i wondered who thought of a pay rise? and makes me also wonder about our GST hike. and many many other things. but oh well
on another note, much love to ayline and zeeq for their comforting notes. yeah the paper is over! and many more to go. thanks for video ayline, i've watched it before, but it still made me smile =)
cheers
tough and trying
its been tough and trying. i didn't sleep a wink because the night before i had a panic attack - that was the most frightening experience of my life - and i just woke up and started screaming at the top of my lungs. last night, i was too afraid to fall asleep. and so many times, i just broke down, because i've got a paper today.
FUCK
i couldn't sleep, really. i can't even control my tears. its sooo tough, but hang on i must. *wipes tears* need to start my day, final revisions and go to school for paper
as my friend said "when the going gets tough, the tough goes shopping!' after the exams, i am buying myself a lanvin ketucky tote that cost $2000. nahz, i am not that rich, buying myself an EDC tote!
i love myself, do you love me?????
FUCK
i couldn't sleep, really. i can't even control my tears. its sooo tough, but hang on i must. *wipes tears* need to start my day, final revisions and go to school for paper
as my friend said "when the going gets tough, the tough goes shopping!' after the exams, i am buying myself a lanvin ketucky tote that cost $2000. nahz, i am not that rich, buying myself an EDC tote!
i love myself, do you love me?????
Apr 23, 2007
Apr 22, 2007
Eddie Izzard
you guys HAVE to watch him, he is the FUNNIEST standup comedian i've seen. much better than russell and margaret. HILARIOUS
change, 改变
刚刚在课本读到一为女生很感人的告白。其实也不能算是告白，比较是她的感想吧。
"I see a problem and i say, 'How can I make a difference?'.... I can't take on world, even though I can try to... I'm moving forward but I want to make sure I'm bringing people with me"
哇！我也是这样想。来我们一起改变世界吧。
＃＃＃＃＃＃
今天好热哦！刚刚在车站等了半小时才等到179。都快疯了！快溶化了。
"I see a problem and i say, 'How can I make a difference?'.... I can't take on world, even though I can try to... I'm moving forward but I want to make sure I'm bringing people with me"
哇！我也是这样想。来我们一起改变世界吧。
＃＃＃＃＃＃
今天好热哦！刚刚在车站等了半小时才等到179。都快疯了！快溶化了。
Apr 21, 2007
Apr 20, 2007
Emotional pain is real, says scientists
full story here http://www.guardian.co.uk/international/story/0,3604,1059990,00.html
"The pain of rejection is more than mere metaphor. A team of scientists have found that to the brain, a social snub is just like stubbing a toe.
Brain scans carried out on volunteers showed that when they suffered a social snub, the brain's "pain centre" went into overdrive. The finding suggests that any emotional stress, such as the demise of a relationship or the loss of a loved one, might be far more closely linked to real pain than previously thought."
click on the link to read more
"The pain of rejection is more than mere metaphor. A team of scientists have found that to the brain, a social snub is just like stubbing a toe.
Brain scans carried out on volunteers showed that when they suffered a social snub, the brain's "pain centre" went into overdrive. The finding suggests that any emotional stress, such as the demise of a relationship or the loss of a loved one, might be far more closely linked to real pain than previously thought."
click on the link to read more
Apr 19, 2007
2 down, 4 to go
yeah, that's right, 2 down and 4 more to go. 4 more highly theoretical papers that require big brains and big application skills. haha the first 2 papers were alright i must say. although my hands were practically paralyzed from writing like 12 pages of essays.
project's done too, and freelance work was done through the night till 5am this morning! and what made me take so long to do it? ask alexis. STUPID MICROSOFT POWERPOINT. oh my god. i can't even begin to tell you how ugly powerpoint is and counter-intuitive. i spent 1 hour trying to change font size, when they keep changing it back!
the whole world should use mac!
then guess what, there was a damn BIG cockroach that flew into my room. i am mortally terrified of them and they love to find me. gosh, i was soooooo stressed out over powerpoint and then a cockroach, i went out to my living room and started crying. thank god daddy caught it.
then guess what's next, there was a tiny lizard that dropped onto my hand. i am alright with lizards, just quite a shock that's all. still getting the creeps with the roach though. i become a full blown woman i tell you!
spent a long long time talking to baby! hahahaha, conversation's so silly but its the small talk that really keeps it going =)
*sprinkles luck* on all those who needs it for exams, not that we really need it huh? we're like oh-so-smart!
project's done too, and freelance work was done through the night till 5am this morning! and what made me take so long to do it? ask alexis. STUPID MICROSOFT POWERPOINT. oh my god. i can't even begin to tell you how ugly powerpoint is and counter-intuitive. i spent 1 hour trying to change font size, when they keep changing it back!
the whole world should use mac!
then guess what, there was a damn BIG cockroach that flew into my room. i am mortally terrified of them and they love to find me. gosh, i was soooooo stressed out over powerpoint and then a cockroach, i went out to my living room and started crying. thank god daddy caught it.
then guess what's next, there was a tiny lizard that dropped onto my hand. i am alright with lizards, just quite a shock that's all. still getting the creeps with the roach though. i become a full blown woman i tell you!
spent a long long time talking to baby! hahahaha, conversation's so silly but its the small talk that really keeps it going =)
*sprinkles luck* on all those who needs it for exams, not that we really need it huh? we're like oh-so-smart!
Apr 17, 2007
Apr 16, 2007
you don't say, google
and what is so interesting about the picture? well someone wanted to drive from New York to Paris, so click on the picture and look at #23, driving instructions 23....
cheers!
its tomorrow
in just a little over 13 hours, i will be facing my first exam paper - Social Psychology! *jitters* but what to do, its going to be a long and arduous exam journey, with 6 papers spread over 2 weeks.
after my exams, i get a week break and special semester starts (who ask me so act smart go and take double major), for 3 weeks, then a 2 week break, then its exam day. then then then..... i fly to melbourne (to see you know who)
here's to all those mugging away with me, and to all those who think about mugging!
cheers for the A's and the A-'s and maybe one B+???????? please...............................
after my exams, i get a week break and special semester starts (who ask me so act smart go and take double major), for 3 weeks, then a 2 week break, then its exam day. then then then..... i fly to melbourne (to see you know who)
here's to all those mugging away with me, and to all those who think about mugging!
cheers for the A's and the A-'s and maybe one B+???????? please...............................
Apr 15, 2007
What's Morally Wrong With Homosexuality?
this was the video that i wanted to post a while back, but couldn't. watch out for the parents bit, and the roman catholic priest but. also watch out for 'the words we use bit!!" enjoy!!!
Apr 14, 2007
work overload
work overload, and being super upset and disillusioned by the government, but what's new in that department.
lets do another run down of the next week schedule
17th - Social Psychology Exams
18th - Intercultural Communication Exams
18th night - Statistics project due
19th morning - Freelance assignment due
why? because it pays the bills! thank god my client/employer is really nice.
and thankfully, my baby's really patient with me.
lets do another run down of the next week schedule
17th - Social Psychology Exams
18th - Intercultural Communication Exams
18th night - Statistics project due
19th morning - Freelance assignment due
why? because it pays the bills! thank god my client/employer is really nice.
and thankfully, my baby's really patient with me.
Apr 12, 2007
hate
hate is a very strong word. such a strong word indeed.
verb [ trans. ]
feel intense or passionate dislike for (someone) : the boys hate each other | he was particularly hated by the extreme right.
• have a strong aversion to (something) : he hates flying | [with infinitive ] I'd hate to live there.
• [with infinitive ] used politely to express one's regret or embarrassment at doing something : I hate to bother you.
verb [ trans. ]
feel intense or passionate dislike for (someone) : the boys hate each other | he was particularly hated by the extreme right.
• have a strong aversion to (something) : he hates flying | [with infinitive ] I'd hate to live there.
• [with infinitive ] used politely to express one's regret or embarrassment at doing something : I hate to bother you.
Apr 11, 2007
quote of the day
"when enlightened dictatorship starts to wither away into irrational authoritarianism"
charming.
charming.
tired, 有点累
好累哦。这几天都不断的用功读书，每天都读到三更半夜在去睡觉。幸亏有爸买的人生燕窝给我提神！其实，我的三更半夜也只是到凌晨两三点，因为我觉得如果这么累，读再多也不能吸收到什么。bodyclock 也需要很多的调整。所以呢，小朋友要去睡了哦。
Apr 9, 2007
midterms and exams
exams are just around the bend and i've still got one essay and one project. talk about going mad and dying. studying has been on schedule, but i've got a freelance project coming up so i have to be ahead of my schedule so i can take up the project, what to do, it pays the bills.
got back another mid terms today. think i fared alright, but it was just a bit below my expectations. yeah i mean it was alright, but why am i not like the top!!! ARGH.
not even sure whether am i at least one standard deviation above the mean, i better be more than 1 SD above the mean!
been trying to upload a video, but it appears that youtube has problem adding this blog to it. so do click on:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OPzso1OOTPM
fascinatingly funny video "what's morally wrong with homosexuality" watch out for the insightful bits about choice of words used, watch out for hilarious comments on the mother and the priest!
cheers
got back another mid terms today. think i fared alright, but it was just a bit below my expectations. yeah i mean it was alright, but why am i not like the top!!! ARGH.
not even sure whether am i at least one standard deviation above the mean, i better be more than 1 SD above the mean!
been trying to upload a video, but it appears that youtube has problem adding this blog to it. so do click on:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OPzso1OOTPM
fascinatingly funny video "what's morally wrong with homosexuality" watch out for the insightful bits about choice of words used, watch out for hilarious comments on the mother and the priest!
cheers
Apr 7, 2007
新生活
是不是觉的好像走到别人的 blog 呢？放心，这还是我小朋友，scott, [k], kiezin, 的地盘。为什么要换网页呢？因为这里是免费的！不用我每年花费宝贵的零用钱来负担。新的 blog，新的生活，全新的我！
考试要到了！我也要埋头苦读了。
幸好还有我的宝贝在我身旁陪伴着我。
考试要到了！我也要埋头苦读了。
幸好还有我的宝贝在我身旁陪伴着我。
colors and me
from http://www.paulgoldinresearch.com/cg
You are constantly hoping that your good fellowship and attitude and your 'love for your fellow man (or women)' will give you peace of mind. You need people - people around you to care for you and to show you that they care. It is this hope that keeps you going, the hope that makes you the type of person that indeed you are. Your own need for approval seemingly makes you always ready to help others and in exchange you seek love, warmth and understanding. You will always listen to others and you are open to new ideas which hopefully will prove fruitful and interesting.
You are working extremely hard trying to improve your image. You need for those people in positions that matter to recognise your potential and to acknowledge you.
You are confined and trapped in a distressing or uncomfortable situation and seeking some way out. Whatever you seem to do to resolve the problem hasn't worked out. Fortunately you are able to gain some aspect of relief from someone close to you.
You are being unduly influenced by the situation that is all around you. You do not like the feeling of loneliness and whatever it is that seems to separate you from others. You know that life can be wonderful and you are anxious to experience life in all its aspects, to live it to the full. You therefore resent any restriction or limitations that are being imposed on you and you insist on going it alone.
You are anxious about all the limitations to which you are subjected to at this time. You feel that you are not valued for what or who you are. You need OUT. So why procrastinate any longer - MOVE!
You are constantly hoping that your good fellowship and attitude and your 'love for your fellow man (or women)' will give you peace of mind. You need people - people around you to care for you and to show you that they care. It is this hope that keeps you going, the hope that makes you the type of person that indeed you are. Your own need for approval seemingly makes you always ready to help others and in exchange you seek love, warmth and understanding. You will always listen to others and you are open to new ideas which hopefully will prove fruitful and interesting.
You are working extremely hard trying to improve your image. You need for those people in positions that matter to recognise your potential and to acknowledge you.
You are confined and trapped in a distressing or uncomfortable situation and seeking some way out. Whatever you seem to do to resolve the problem hasn't worked out. Fortunately you are able to gain some aspect of relief from someone close to you.
You are being unduly influenced by the situation that is all around you. You do not like the feeling of loneliness and whatever it is that seems to separate you from others. You know that life can be wonderful and you are anxious to experience life in all its aspects, to live it to the full. You therefore resent any restriction or limitations that are being imposed on you and you insist on going it alone.
You are anxious about all the limitations to which you are subjected to at this time. You feel that you are not valued for what or who you are. You need OUT. So why procrastinate any longer - MOVE!
Apr 6, 2007
of exams and PMS
i realized that whenever it is exam period, i would get very pms-y. like super pms-y. and i think all my boyfriend, ex and jem included suffer the brunt of it. not that i am being mad and start scolding people lah, but just pms-y in general. like will get moody and all the nonsense.
i suppose that is because of my perfectionist. i absolutely hate to fall behind my planned schedule, i hate it when i get unproductive. like today. i spent half day covering half a chapter. what the fuck. at this rate i would not get my As. i might even get below B+. how traumatizing is that!!!!!
and and and, i've got projects due AFTER exams starts. like seriously. i got lecture on thursday, and the same subject's exams on tuesday. and yes what is covered on thursday is examinable. LIKE FUCK YOU SU GUAN YING!! can you please use some brains that a study week would be really useful! why is NTU always one step behind everyone.
i did mention that i am pms-ing right? that includes being whiny.
i am gg to sit and sulk now because i got no dinner...
thank god dear is patient!!
i suppose that is because of my perfectionist. i absolutely hate to fall behind my planned schedule, i hate it when i get unproductive. like today. i spent half day covering half a chapter. what the fuck. at this rate i would not get my As. i might even get below B+. how traumatizing is that!!!!!
and and and, i've got projects due AFTER exams starts. like seriously. i got lecture on thursday, and the same subject's exams on tuesday. and yes what is covered on thursday is examinable. LIKE FUCK YOU SU GUAN YING!! can you please use some brains that a study week would be really useful! why is NTU always one step behind everyone.
i did mention that i am pms-ing right? that includes being whiny.
i am gg to sit and sulk now because i got no dinner...
thank god dear is patient!!
Apr 1, 2007
Mar 27, 2007
well lets see how i am going to murder myself in the next month.
i have a 3000 word essay due this friday. i have a presentation next tuesday. i have another term paper to finish by next thursday morning because it is due when i am still overseas. i also have my exams in 20 days. i also have to give tuition and my freelance project which starts from the day i come back from thailand and right before my exams (why? because i've got bills to pay)
then its exams all the way till april 30th. one week breather and its special semester! i am mad yes i know.
i figured that if i studied 4-7 chapters a day, i will just nice finish studying everything in time for my exams. BUT, i don't even have time to finish my work! let alone study.
I AM DYING! OH MY GOODNESS GRACIOUS ME. ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
i have a 3000 word essay due this friday. i have a presentation next tuesday. i have another term paper to finish by next thursday morning because it is due when i am still overseas. i also have my exams in 20 days. i also have to give tuition and my freelance project which starts from the day i come back from thailand and right before my exams (why? because i've got bills to pay)
then its exams all the way till april 30th. one week breather and its special semester! i am mad yes i know.
i figured that if i studied 4-7 chapters a day, i will just nice finish studying everything in time for my exams. BUT, i don't even have time to finish my work! let alone study.
I AM DYING! OH MY GOODNESS GRACIOUS ME. ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Mar 20, 2007
i bring to you news report from CNET, on how to make sure your computer is safe from viruses.
DO NOT USE OneCare
http://news.com.com/2061-10789_3-6168629.html?part=rss&tag=2547-1_3-0-5&subj=news
"Since shipping in May, OneCare has failed industry tests and exposed users to attack because of a security flaw in the antivirus engine. The application also incorrectly flagged Gmail as a virus and in some cases quarantined or even deleted complete in-boxes when a single e-mail was laden with a virus."
Well, of course OneCare is by Microsoft. Read the full story:
It was already clear that Microsoft's Windows Live OneCare isn't a best-in-class security product. Instead, OneCare is a newcomer that needs to mature. Now a Microsoft employee has said that the product shipped too soon.
"OneCare is a new product--they shouldn't have rolled it out when they did, but they're fixing the problems now," Arno Edelmann, Microsoft's European business security product manager, told CNET News.com sister site ZDNet UK last week.
In the ZDNet UK piece, Edelmann is quoted as saying that "bits and pieces are missing" from OneCare. Key parts of the trouble with the application lie in the update mechanism and the underlying antivirus engine, according to the article.
Since shipping in May, OneCare has failed industry tests and exposed users to attack because of a security flaw in the antivirus engine. The application also incorrectly flagged Gmail as a virus and in some cases quarantined or even deleted complete in-boxes when a single e-mail was laden with a virus.
DO NOT USE OneCare
http://news.com.com/2061-10789_3-6168629.html?part=rss&tag=2547-1_3-0-5&subj=news
"Since shipping in May, OneCare has failed industry tests and exposed users to attack because of a security flaw in the antivirus engine. The application also incorrectly flagged Gmail as a virus and in some cases quarantined or even deleted complete in-boxes when a single e-mail was laden with a virus."
Well, of course OneCare is by Microsoft. Read the full story:
It was already clear that Microsoft's Windows Live OneCare isn't a best-in-class security product. Instead, OneCare is a newcomer that needs to mature. Now a Microsoft employee has said that the product shipped too soon.
"OneCare is a new product--they shouldn't have rolled it out when they did, but they're fixing the problems now," Arno Edelmann, Microsoft's European business security product manager, told CNET News.com sister site ZDNet UK last week.
In the ZDNet UK piece, Edelmann is quoted as saying that "bits and pieces are missing" from OneCare. Key parts of the trouble with the application lie in the update mechanism and the underlying antivirus engine, according to the article.
Since shipping in May, OneCare has failed industry tests and exposed users to attack because of a security flaw in the antivirus engine. The application also incorrectly flagged Gmail as a virus and in some cases quarantined or even deleted complete in-boxes when a single e-mail was laden with a virus.
Mar 18, 2007
someone whom i don't know passed away today. but in some indirect way, there's a relation. and then i found myself at a loss of words, because i am not quite sure what to say, for fear of not saying the right things, and end up being disrespectful or insensitive.
in fact i am not even sure what to do.
and that led me to think about death. some time ago, i casually told my friends that should i die, i want kylie minogue to be playing at my wake. it may sound like a joke, but i think the idea is not a joke. for me, death is something that is sad only because there's a loss. but more than being sad, we should celebrate a life well-lived. a life filled with meaning, and then to reflect on our life now. because we never know what is going to happen tomorrow, are we going to regret anything if tomorrow never arrived.
i've always been quite happy, there's nothing i would change about my life even if i could, because i appreciate every single experience!
so yes, when i die, play kylie minogue and have fun, and celebrate for me a life full of surprises, unexpected twists, ups and down, full of meaning and joy. a life that we own, a life!
in fact i am not even sure what to do.
and that led me to think about death. some time ago, i casually told my friends that should i die, i want kylie minogue to be playing at my wake. it may sound like a joke, but i think the idea is not a joke. for me, death is something that is sad only because there's a loss. but more than being sad, we should celebrate a life well-lived. a life filled with meaning, and then to reflect on our life now. because we never know what is going to happen tomorrow, are we going to regret anything if tomorrow never arrived.
i've always been quite happy, there's nothing i would change about my life even if i could, because i appreciate every single experience!
so yes, when i die, play kylie minogue and have fun, and celebrate for me a life full of surprises, unexpected twists, ups and down, full of meaning and joy. a life that we own, a life!
Mar 12, 2007
Bon Jovi-All about loving you
This is the sweetest MTV I've seen. I know you've watched it before, but I still want to share it with you again =)
Mar 11, 2007
over the weekend, i met up with jeth and jiahui and mark, and guess what was their first remark.
"hey kiez, did you dye hair black?"
like black wasn't my natural hair colour!!! ARGH, apparently i've been all shades of blonde for way too long. i have decided to keep black hair for this season!
lynette decided to make all of us laugh our dinner out when she declared that 你摸了我的心。literally translated from the english line: "you touched my heart"
joy to the world, to my friends and i!
"hey kiez, did you dye hair black?"
like black wasn't my natural hair colour!!! ARGH, apparently i've been all shades of blonde for way too long. i have decided to keep black hair for this season!
lynette decided to make all of us laugh our dinner out when she declared that 你摸了我的心。literally translated from the english line: "you touched my heart"
joy to the world, to my friends and i!
Mar 3, 2007
this is my strawberry cream cheesecake! i baked it all by myself! and my mom - who once spat out my baked mushroom - told me that it is very delicious! I AM SOOOOOOOO HAPPY
alexis decided that i am rather domesticated. I AM NOT!!!!!!! but i dun mind being a house-husband and make delicious dinner and picking my baby up from work. HAHAHA okokok [scream: GROSSS]
who wants to eat????
Mar 2, 2007
NYT: Did Microsoft rip-off Apple Mac OS X in Windows Vista?
ok, i love this video. david pogue of new york times sets out to show that windows vista did not rip off mac os x. that whatever we had for the past 3 years are different than what vista is having now. watch it!
Mar 1, 2007
why i can't stand rich losers!!!!
i study my ass off to get a double major in a really hard to enter course, and just because everywhere rejects rich losers cause their academic is not good enough for local universities, there are those private universities that allows people to enter with O levels. FREAKING O levels and they can complete their double major with 120 credits!!! OMG! i take 173 credits, 40 modules plus one semester at internship to complete my double major in 7 semesters. and i need GPA of 4/5. they need a GPA of 2.5/4 and that is called GOOD ACADEMIC STANDING... that is called lousiest student in my school!!!
and guess what, they get a degree by University at Buffalo, The State University of New York with SIM.... and i, a university called NTU..
I WANT TO SMACK SOME ASS!!!
######
edit:
and i am whining because i don't have access to such resources. like my bitch ling puts it, the rich will only get richer using her psuedo-evolution theory. and i am again not complaining about my family because my dad really works very very hard for us. its just this whole sandwiched class thing that we cannot get out of. no matter how hard the powers that be tells you. its not possible. its not even like i get bad grades. my grades are not that bad, better than most of the freaking rich people that goes overseas on their parents wealth, and they come back and get even richer.
and i will be just one of those lemmings. one of those lemmings in life. not the lower class, but the middle class lemmings. one of them. just because i don't have the means to do what i want to do.
look down on me.
i study my ass off to get a double major in a really hard to enter course, and just because everywhere rejects rich losers cause their academic is not good enough for local universities, there are those private universities that allows people to enter with O levels. FREAKING O levels and they can complete their double major with 120 credits!!! OMG! i take 173 credits, 40 modules plus one semester at internship to complete my double major in 7 semesters. and i need GPA of 4/5. they need a GPA of 2.5/4 and that is called GOOD ACADEMIC STANDING... that is called lousiest student in my school!!!
and guess what, they get a degree by University at Buffalo, The State University of New York with SIM.... and i, a university called NTU..
I WANT TO SMACK SOME ASS!!!
######
edit:
and i am whining because i don't have access to such resources. like my bitch ling puts it, the rich will only get richer using her psuedo-evolution theory. and i am again not complaining about my family because my dad really works very very hard for us. its just this whole sandwiched class thing that we cannot get out of. no matter how hard the powers that be tells you. its not possible. its not even like i get bad grades. my grades are not that bad, better than most of the freaking rich people that goes overseas on their parents wealth, and they come back and get even richer.
and i will be just one of those lemmings. one of those lemmings in life. not the lower class, but the middle class lemmings. one of them. just because i don't have the means to do what i want to do.
look down on me.
Feb 28, 2007
Apple WWDC 2006-Windows Vista Copies Mac OS X
this is so damn funny! omg!!! watch it and eat your heart out. =p
Feb 25, 2007
mommy told me about her friend's son in NUS who wants to take a semester off because he can't cope with the stress of school anymore and he doesn't want to lose it. and i was thinking how this whole double major and assorted stress is worth it. well this semester is really quite a busy semester, and then there's work and every other thing.
and it seems that everyone is so busy and so stressed. always functioning just below that threshold. i am so glad that the holidays are here because i am almost at the max that i could take.
singaporeans, the have-nots will always be studying here, in a system that stretches you thin, encouraged apathy and rejects pro-active and initiative, and the very system then wonders about patriotism. the same system whereby the haves will be studying overseas regardless if they could or could not enter the singapore universities and they do really well there (despite not being able to enter the local system) and they come back being much more respected than the have-nots just because of some US, UK or that is not from singapore.
wondering about income gap or income disparity? well, it is not a case where the rich get richer and the poor get richer. its indeed the rich get MUCH richer and the poor gets poorer.
welcome to my country.
and it seems that everyone is so busy and so stressed. always functioning just below that threshold. i am so glad that the holidays are here because i am almost at the max that i could take.
singaporeans, the have-nots will always be studying here, in a system that stretches you thin, encouraged apathy and rejects pro-active and initiative, and the very system then wonders about patriotism. the same system whereby the haves will be studying overseas regardless if they could or could not enter the singapore universities and they do really well there (despite not being able to enter the local system) and they come back being much more respected than the have-nots just because of some US, UK or
wondering about income gap or income disparity? well, it is not a case where the rich get richer and the poor get richer. its indeed the rich get MUCH richer and the poor gets poorer.
welcome to my country.
Feb 20, 2007
after so many months and years, the scars do not go away. and they only serve to remind me that beneath this happy-go-lucky, this cheerful exterior is just a messed up person who yearns for affection and love. it is just a little boy that wants to be hug.
years go by but nothing really changes. and sitting here looking at myself, and i wonder what a failure i've been.
happy chinese new year to me.
years go by but nothing really changes. and sitting here looking at myself, and i wonder what a failure i've been.
happy chinese new year to me.
Feb 19, 2007
what is the point of saying what a person feels when nothing is done thereafter. hence what is the whole point of talking. shouldn't a person's action also strives to make the other person comfortable? if everybody should be able to do exactly what they want without considering the other person, then wouldn't the world be in chaos.
if someone express discomfort, should we then still go ahead with the thing that makes the person uncomfortable to make the person even more uncomfortable?
if someone express discomfort, should we then still go ahead with the thing that makes the person uncomfortable to make the person even more uncomfortable?
Feb 18, 2007
Feb 14, 2007
in the midst of studying again, and i am beginning to love this peaceful feeling even more. talking to someone about my anger management issues is really helping a lot. well for starters i am a lot more patient these days (even alexis and lynette noted that!)
and the book 'the art of happiness' puts its more into perspective. life, and the purpose of life.
ah, what a sweet serenity.
and the book 'the art of happiness' puts its more into perspective. life, and the purpose of life.
ah, what a sweet serenity.
in the midst of studying for a quiz and listening to music on a quiet night. everything seems peaceful. all that's missing from this night is just someone by my side.
i like how music set the mood. how if the music changes, the entire experience changes.
and right now, its making appreciate everything around me, enjoying this moment.
i like how music set the mood. how if the music changes, the entire experience changes.
and right now, its making appreciate everything around me, enjoying this moment.
Feb 11, 2007
awww, thanks to all of you for being so nice and concerned over my scuffle with my mom. not exactly a scuffle but well. you know woman are damn weird! immediately after she yelled at me, she came home and talked to me as if nothing has happened. can you imagine how off balanced i was feeling. it is such a weird moment for me.
but things are fine now, and it seems that she don't really want me to go over because she doesn't think gay relationship can last a lifetime and therefore i shouldn't waste money, not that she can't accept me being gay - i think my father is better at that than my mom.
baby was comforting in his way, rationalizing things for me to see. and well it appears that all moms speak like that - for who knows what reason. and i decided that i will prove my mom wrong! that i am going to grow old with my baby =)
hehehehehe. alright, that was mushy enough!
but things are fine now, and it seems that she don't really want me to go over because she doesn't think gay relationship can last a lifetime and therefore i shouldn't waste money, not that she can't accept me being gay - i think my father is better at that than my mom.
baby was comforting in his way, rationalizing things for me to see. and well it appears that all moms speak like that - for who knows what reason. and i decided that i will prove my mom wrong! that i am going to grow old with my baby =)
hehehehehe. alright, that was mushy enough!
Feb 9, 2007
its not as if a long distance relationship is not hard enough as it already is. then there's the whole issue of not meeting and my mom actually thinks that not meeting for an entire year is alright, in fact it is quite a lot to meet once a year. i told her that in june i would like to find him, then she just started screaming like a mad woman. i have no idea why. she went on and on about she doesn't know why i have to go to melbourne again. why not another place.
its not as if she doesn't know i am dating him. then she went on to say that there are many people who date overseas but don't meet, i told her fuck you, find one person for me and she couldn't. she said that she and my dad. she's malaysian and my dad's indonesian. yar right. they both stayed in singapore when they dated.
damn fucked up.
and its not as if i am not stressed out and maxed out by school. i worked hard and study hard so i can finance myself, don't tax my parents too much, and give them a good life for taking care of me, and she keeps saying till like i am the most useless thing on earth, i love her so much why does she hate me so much.
its not as if she doesn't know i am dating him. then she went on to say that there are many people who date overseas but don't meet, i told her fuck you, find one person for me and she couldn't. she said that she and my dad. she's malaysian and my dad's indonesian. yar right. they both stayed in singapore when they dated.
damn fucked up.
and its not as if i am not stressed out and maxed out by school. i worked hard and study hard so i can finance myself, don't tax my parents too much, and give them a good life for taking care of me, and she keeps saying till like i am the most useless thing on earth, i love her so much why does she hate me so much.
Feb 8, 2007
in our lecture today, we covered something called cognitive dissonance, one interesting question that was posed was that despite we all feel that clearing our readings by the week is better than leaving it all till the end of the semester, none of us do that.
then i talked to gabby and reflected on our situation. its not as if that we do not want to do our readings, in fact we are quite far behind. but this semester has really been quite overwhelming in terms of work, and we are working by deadlines.
everyday is filled up with school, assignments and planning for projects and a bit of readings. i can't possibly work without resting at all. i need to rest and relax and talk to my baby (=p). so i need my tv shows and skype hours. seriously 24 hours a day is a stretch. and i do not have much time left for my darling friends or even swimming! over and on top of that, i have to give tuition for pocket money. sigh
what an overwhelming semester. i want my life back!
then i talked to gabby and reflected on our situation. its not as if that we do not want to do our readings, in fact we are quite far behind. but this semester has really been quite overwhelming in terms of work, and we are working by deadlines.
everyday is filled up with school, assignments and planning for projects and a bit of readings. i can't possibly work without resting at all. i need to rest and relax and talk to my baby (=p). so i need my tv shows and skype hours. seriously 24 hours a day is a stretch. and i do not have much time left for my darling friends or even swimming! over and on top of that, i have to give tuition for pocket money. sigh
what an overwhelming semester. i want my life back!
Feb 2, 2007
what really scares me is how emotions and anger can consume. and how being more educated doesn't make any more difference. in fact it only seems to make things worse because the more educated we all get, the more we know, the more we all think we are right.
spent the whole night doing statistics is quite draining, and to top it up there's a stats lecture. following stats lecture is interpersonal. and taking that course makes me so much more aware, but it doesn't seem to be making it better (i think it does, but i am not really sure)
according to various measures, i am an idealistic romantic. and being romantic in outlook is apparently not as good because of unrealistic expectations. the 6 unrealistic and damaging expectations
1. disagreements are destructive
2. partners cannot change
3. mindreading is essential
4. sex must be perfect everytime
5. men and women are just different
6. great relationship just happens
well, number 5 doesn't really apply. but i suppose i need to change my paradigm. great relationships take effort and work. and disagreements are opportunities to know each other better. and that humans all change with interaction to each other.
"well now I am grown
and these years have shown
that rain's a part of how life goes
but it's dark and it's late
so I'll hold you and wait
'til your frightened eyes do close
and I hope that you'll know...
that nature is so
the same rain that draws you near me
falls on rivers and land
on forests and sand
makes the beautiful world that you'll see
in the morning
everything's fine in the morning
the rain'll be gone in the morning
but I'll still be here in the morning"
spent the whole night doing statistics is quite draining, and to top it up there's a stats lecture. following stats lecture is interpersonal. and taking that course makes me so much more aware, but it doesn't seem to be making it better (i think it does, but i am not really sure)
according to various measures, i am an idealistic romantic. and being romantic in outlook is apparently not as good because of unrealistic expectations. the 6 unrealistic and damaging expectations
1. disagreements are destructive
2. partners cannot change
3. mindreading is essential
4. sex must be perfect everytime
5. men and women are just different
6. great relationship just happens
well, number 5 doesn't really apply. but i suppose i need to change my paradigm. great relationships take effort and work. and disagreements are opportunities to know each other better. and that humans all change with interaction to each other.
"well now I am grown
and these years have shown
that rain's a part of how life goes
but it's dark and it's late
so I'll hold you and wait
'til your frightened eyes do close
and I hope that you'll know...
that nature is so
the same rain that draws you near me
falls on rivers and land
on forests and sand
makes the beautiful world that you'll see
in the morning
everything's fine in the morning
the rain'll be gone in the morning
but I'll still be here in the morning"
Jan 30, 2007
after so many years, i am still ENFP, after taking so many different test. haha according to the brutally honest test, me, lynette are still the same even after taking the REAL, paid for test.
apparently i am the
#####
i want to spend the rest of my entry complaining about alexis! i have a love hate relationship with her. she told me today that she doesn't think i am cute ($!%@%@%#!@%#!%!%!). then half an hour later, she told me that i am not cute, but good looking. she is sending me double-bind messages. so i don't really know to love her or to hate her. we decided that love-hate relationship is the way to go from now on!
hahahaha. lynette decided that i wasn't cute, but magazine good looking. that's why i like lynette. she tells good lies. LOL.
[my baby insist that i am narcisstic]
apparently i am the
Scumbag- ENFP 66% Extraversion, 73% Intuition, 23% Thinking, 40% Judging |
I have a feeling you're not going to like this much. Do I care? No. How do I know? It's because you hate criticism. You love to be loved and you'll do anything to be accepted.
*****************
*****************
|
 |
My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:
|
| Link: The Brutally Honest Personality Test written by UltimateMaster on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the The Dating Persona Test |
#####
i want to spend the rest of my entry complaining about alexis! i have a love hate relationship with her. she told me today that she doesn't think i am cute ($!%@%@%#!@%#!%!%!). then half an hour later, she told me that i am not cute, but good looking. she is sending me double-bind messages. so i don't really know to love her or to hate her. we decided that love-hate relationship is the way to go from now on!
hahahaha. lynette decided that i wasn't cute, but magazine good looking. that's why i like lynette. she tells good lies. LOL.
[my baby insist that i am narcisstic]
Jan 28, 2007
its one of those times i wonder if any of us knows exactly where we are going and what are we doing in life? it is one of those times i feel powerless and weak to stop the incredible force of the world. a world heading for destruction, a world hurtling towards the end and powerless to stop it.
every single policy, every single damn thing revolves around money, rather than saying we're a meritocracy society, i propose that we call ourselves a monetary society, and just gracefully admit we're all sluts for money. ALL OF US. we're slaving our lives away for money, for the superficial, for the glamourous.
we tax the poor to help the poor, we lower the taxes for the rich, lower corporate taxes for the rich, so the rich is going to get richer, and then the poor can get poorer. money. work. money. study, so that we can work in the future. money. money money money. money is indeed the new religion.
and with globalisation, the rich people can live in the richest and most comfortable places in the world, and pay taxes in the poorest place, so they pay the least tax. and for anybody who tries to tell you that everyone is better off. tell them to open their eyes. with capitalism comes some of the worst living conditions ever. just look at singapore, and walk behind the skyscraping towers, you'll see living conditions not a single one of you who can read this can ever imagine.
countries where water is scarce. EVERYWHERE. but you who is reading this, is still wasting water while brushing your teeth, taking plastic bags for nonsensically small items, throwing away paper and printing ONE SIDE on fresh unrecycled paper.
powerless to stop the mad worshipping of money and luxury.
at times like this i tell myself that all i want in my life is happiness. permanent happiness that even with no money, i will still be happy. and i will work towards being happy. being fulfilled, making myself feel happy in a way that money cannot make me feel.
every single policy, every single damn thing revolves around money, rather than saying we're a meritocracy society, i propose that we call ourselves a monetary society, and just gracefully admit we're all sluts for money. ALL OF US. we're slaving our lives away for money, for the superficial, for the glamourous.
we tax the poor to help the poor, we lower the taxes for the rich, lower corporate taxes for the rich, so the rich is going to get richer, and then the poor can get poorer. money. work. money. study, so that we can work in the future. money. money money money. money is indeed the new religion.
and with globalisation, the rich people can live in the richest and most comfortable places in the world, and pay taxes in the poorest place, so they pay the least tax. and for anybody who tries to tell you that everyone is better off. tell them to open their eyes. with capitalism comes some of the worst living conditions ever. just look at singapore, and walk behind the skyscraping towers, you'll see living conditions not a single one of you who can read this can ever imagine.
countries where water is scarce. EVERYWHERE. but you who is reading this, is still wasting water while brushing your teeth, taking plastic bags for nonsensically small items, throwing away paper and printing ONE SIDE on fresh unrecycled paper.
powerless to stop the mad worshipping of money and luxury.
at times like this i tell myself that all i want in my life is happiness. permanent happiness that even with no money, i will still be happy. and i will work towards being happy. being fulfilled, making myself feel happy in a way that money cannot make me feel.
Jan 25, 2007
Jan 20, 2007
you know your are in trouble when your own Chief of your software describe the upcoming software as "a pig", and concedes that if he was not working with your company he would buy a rival.
welcome Jim Allchin, Windows chief of Microsoft.
#####
In a 2004 e-mail to Chairman Bill Gates and CEO Steve Ballmer made public during opening arguments in December, Allchin criticized Windows and said ``I would buy a Mac today if I was not working at Microsoft.''
Allchin at the time was leading development of Longhorn, the code name for Windows Vista, which reaches stores Jan. 30. Allchin, who is retiring after Vista is released, referred to Longhorn as ``a pig'' and said ``we have lost our way.''
Read the full story here @ http://www.bloomberg.com/apps/news?pid=conewsstory&refer=conews&tkr=AAPL:US&sid=aZdk6J4hbFEg
welcome Jim Allchin, Windows chief of Microsoft.
#####
In a 2004 e-mail to Chairman Bill Gates and CEO Steve Ballmer made public during opening arguments in December, Allchin criticized Windows and said ``I would buy a Mac today if I was not working at Microsoft.''
Allchin at the time was leading development of Longhorn, the code name for Windows Vista, which reaches stores Jan. 30. Allchin, who is retiring after Vista is released, referred to Longhorn as ``a pig'' and said ``we have lost our way.''
Read the full story here @ http://www.bloomberg.com/apps/news?pid=conewsstory&refer=conews&tkr=AAPL:US&sid=aZdk6J4hbFEg
Jan 19, 2007
i think maybe i have far too many issues.
i don't know why, but i have low self-esteem and i feel so insecure. i am always scared of being abandoned and not being loved. sometimes i am even wonder why if i am worth it. i have this need to want to know that i am special, and i simply cannot fathom out why. is it something to do with before?
i am a mix of so many things.
and i want to try to change and i have changed quite a fair bit, but there's a long way to go to address some underlying issues. like why am i so scared to be left alone. or the thought that i am not really that special scares me.
does that sound freaky?
many things to be done, and i have to do it myself. i must be more secure and feel better about myself. somewhere, there's an answer.
i don't know why, but i have low self-esteem and i feel so insecure. i am always scared of being abandoned and not being loved. sometimes i am even wonder why if i am worth it. i have this need to want to know that i am special, and i simply cannot fathom out why. is it something to do with before?
i am a mix of so many things.
and i want to try to change and i have changed quite a fair bit, but there's a long way to go to address some underlying issues. like why am i so scared to be left alone. or the thought that i am not really that special scares me.
does that sound freaky?
many things to be done, and i have to do it myself. i must be more secure and feel better about myself. somewhere, there's an answer.
Jan 18, 2007
hey you guys, i am still alive! school has started already, not like most of you don't already know. in fact most are you are probably in the same situation as me huh? i like school. well, i love it. CS ROCKS!
spent a gazillion amout of money on textbooks. i am a nerd! what can i say.
watching project superstar, and i must say that carrie was really good on her last song, she really moved me. now to see how the guys perform! hope she stacks up well.
updates on my life? well i am still madly in love and totally 24/7-ing. and lynette cannot stand it! she's just jealous i swear! hrmm looking forward to work! is there any job for me. those who have lobang, you know how to contact me.
oh yar you guys have gotta read this article by Erika Jonietz : "I have insisted that MS-DOS wasn't hard to use (once you got used to it), that Windows 3.1 was the greatest innovation in desktop operating systems....Ironically, playing around with [Windows] Vista for more than a month has done what years of experience and exhortations from Mac-loving friends could not: it has converted me into a Mac fan."
read it here http://www.technologyreview.com/Infotech/17992/page1/
you know mac rocks when everybody in the windows world are converting to mac, because "Mac crashes were easier to recover from than the infamous Blue Screen of Death", and zero viruses and because mac just works. you plug it in and VOILA!
spent a gazillion amout of money on textbooks. i am a nerd! what can i say.
watching project superstar, and i must say that carrie was really good on her last song, she really moved me. now to see how the guys perform! hope she stacks up well.
updates on my life? well i am still madly in love and totally 24/7-ing. and lynette cannot stand it! she's just jealous i swear! hrmm looking forward to work! is there any job for me. those who have lobang, you know how to contact me.
oh yar you guys have gotta read this article by Erika Jonietz : "I have insisted that MS-DOS wasn't hard to use (once you got used to it), that Windows 3.1 was the greatest innovation in desktop operating systems....Ironically, playing around with [Windows] Vista for more than a month has done what years of experience and exhortations from Mac-loving friends could not: it has converted me into a Mac fan."
read it here http://www.technologyreview.com/Infotech/17992/page1/
you know mac rocks when everybody in the windows world are converting to mac, because "Mac crashes were easier to recover from than the infamous Blue Screen of Death", and zero viruses and because mac just works. you plug it in and VOILA!
Jan 5, 2007
i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid, i am not stupid.
Jan 1, 2007
2006 is finally over; its been such a long year. i barely remember how 2006 started, the memory is a bit faint. bits and pieces, all over the place.
so many events happened in 2006, that i don't really what to say. ups and downs. very down after the break up. exams woes, ridiculous things happening. everything, you name it, i've probably gone through it.
i was ready to think that 2006 is without a doubt the worse year of my life, but something magical happened and 2006 ended with a bang, and quite some tears.
thank you for coming into my life and making everything so beautiful and so perfect.
=)
so many events happened in 2006, that i don't really what to say. ups and downs. very down after the break up. exams woes, ridiculous things happening. everything, you name it, i've probably gone through it.
i was ready to think that 2006 is without a doubt the worse year of my life, but something magical happened and 2006 ended with a bang, and quite some tears.
thank you for coming into my life and making everything so beautiful and so perfect.
=)
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