Paris Trip - A preview

Hello! So I've been back from Paris for more than a week now, and its back to the daily grind. Sorry for the lack of updates but they will be coming, this weekend when I have the time to blog. But for those of you who are reading this, here's a lovely picture of the Eiffel Tower!

Random Updates

Some random mid week updates. I've got a new polo tee! Courtesy of fabz who got it for me at the Zouk Flea! Its the normal red polka dots (which are so cute) and the double buttons (as you can see down in the picture below) is really a very special and unique feature!

- loves the polka dots -

And this week @alexischeong and I had lunch at The Plain @ Craig Road! Blogged about this place earlier on, and we still love the ciabattas there. And yes there's this drink that I secretly really like: Aranciata Rossa. Secretly because I think anyone who drinks San Pellegrino (like sparkling water) is totally pretentious, so I try my best to dissociate with the brand. But alas, the blood orange drink is so YUMS!!

- Salami Ciabatta -

- The Aranciata Rossa -

And lastly, I am always distracted by colours, and here's @alexischeong 88 colour eyeshadow palette! Pretty!

/end of bimbotic post

Standing up for "Gay Parents Bashed"

Today I came across this video on my tumblr, and I teared uncontrollably when watching this. Please watch the video embedded before reading on.

What really surprised me was that a place like Texas (where the homophobic Bush came from) showed us that in times like this, solidarity for humanity will prevail. Nobody could stand around and watch the waitress insult and demean the lesbian and gay parents. And what really gets me is the guy that we all think looks like a gangster turns out to be filled with so much love, it puts all of us to shame. When he went out to write a note to let the lesbian parents know just how beautiful their family is, means so much to the actress that it made her cry, because it spoke to her in real life.

"In the end, you will not remember the words of our enemies,

but the silence of your friends" - Martin Luther King, Jr

The quote above defined the gesture because like it says, if a friend sees you in trouble but chooses to keep silent, it will be more hurtful than anything else. Day in day out, a big group of homosexual people faces either overt discrimination (like the video), or silent discrimination. Not to say that homosexuals have a harder time than other people, but definitely there is a bigger baggage to carry. I've been there and its not easy.

Was there any point in time where you could have made a world of a difference to your gay friends by standing up for them? Or by supporting them in your own ways? Make it happen and don't stay by the side and watch.

It is also a particularly poignant topic for me because late last night, the boy and I were watching the movie "The Love of Siam", and we have a very long conversation after that which we talked about pretty much the same issue. He has been struggling to come to terms with himself, and the invisible pressure that he faces from society can really be too much to bear even for the strongest individual.

On the other, I am so glad I have survived and are now in the stage of my life where "it is better". I do not have any fears of judgment from anyone about my sexuality because this is who I am, and I make no apologies for it. But I cannot stand by and not share what I've been through. I want to let every individual, gay or otherwise know that humanity will shine through, each and every time.

Don't be afraid to be yourself, and be who you are. Because you are beautiful just the way you are.

I am a thankful boy...

..for the great things and people that have entered my life and made it the way it is today! What prompted me to write this? Its this video here:

This video is made for this year's Pink Dot! And it reminds of the many different times in my life, and the different stages I had to go through to be who I am today. A gay man who is very comfortable with my sexuality, have my friends love me for exactly who I am, have my mother who tells me that my happiness is more important than anything else in the world, and to work in a company where my heterosexual boss can joke around with me. I am grateful.

The first scene of the clips reminds me of Jeremiah. He's this very peculiar friend of mine, and peculiar here carries no negative connotation. I knew Jere in PRIMARY SCHOOL! (Can you believe it) but it wasn't till junior college that we got close, close enough for me to come out to him, and it was with much fear. I will never forget how he defended gay men in camp. Jere told me about the jokes and things that his army mates will say, and oftentimes, even I would let it just pass and allow them to make derogatory remarks. But not Jere. He told them that not all gay men are like that, one of his besties (that's me!) is nothing like what they say, and it is through little actions like that, that people can stop viewing gay people through tinted lenses. So thank you Jere!

And its not just him, all my friends have been nothing but loving - too many to name, but you know who you are. You've all been through my ups and my downs, listened to me cry over man, or men (depending on when you knew me), and it was never with judgement nor disapproval, aside from the disapproval that I allow myself to get hurt. There's so much love from so many of you. You've even been through my coming out process with my mom.

It was not actually a coming out process because mommies always know. Trust me. And it started out really as a power issue which then led me to officially come out to her, and boy was it nasty. After a couple of weeks of not talking to me, and me writing a very long and heartfelt letter to her, she asked me one evening what I would like to eat for dinner. Its her way of saying things are going to be fine now. Eventually she told me that she wants me to be happy, and she cannot bear to be like the other moms who forced their sons to get married, and end up with 3 unhappy people and a broken family.

Every time I recount this story I will tear, like how my mom told me, after a very messy breakup, that even if the sky falls down, she will hold it up for me. How can I not be thankful to an incredible mommy like her. And my other family members too!

And things today can't be any better. My mom loves fabby and we practically live together for more days of the week than I can count, and he's been the sweetest boy (he made my mom a Mother's Day card), my work environment is loving and accepting. I can't think of a better personal life yet.

So dear friends, won't you join me this June 18 at the Pink Dot, so that we can show everyone that there's nothing wrong with my love, it is the same love as your love and the same as everyone's else. And tell all the gay people you know that you love them for exactly who they are.

Love,

Scotty

The week

Sometimes routine can be comforting, and its nice when things have sorta settled into a nice rhythm. Of course this cannot come with the usual taken for granted bullshit, and one must always be appreciative, and I am thankful that this is indeed what's happening.

Grateful that after such a long journey, I'm not walking this path alone anymore =)

- late dinner with the boy. ayam penyet FTW -

- a packed shelf with too many little things -

A very gorgeous video

Timelapse - The City Limits from Dominic on Vimeo.

I really love this video so much that I have to share it here. Also so that I can remember what I've been watching. Keep watching till 2:45 or so, it'll blow you away.

I want a Singapore with a Soul and not $ingapore Inc.

I haven't written much for this elections, which is a peculiar case because my friends know that I have a lot to say for this election. But the poll is just slightly more than 24 hours away and write I must because so many things are at stake. Stakes that I would eternally regret if I know that at least one of you might be inspired by this simple piece but made the wrong choice because I didn't write.

What is it about this particular election that fills me so much passion and makes me so involved? Its the fight for Singapore, specifically the Singapore Soul and not $ingapore Inc.

My dear friends, just take a moment to think back about 5-10 years ago, about what life was like, what did you see around you? How did you feel? Do you recall seeing old folks, or very old folks cleaning the toilets, working 24 hours shifts at hawker centres wiping tables with dirty cloths and wearing glum faces while you are having supper? Do you feel hopeful about life, or do you feel worried and stressed out?

$ingapore has always been run as a business and if money can buy us everything in this world, then its great, go ahead. But unfortunately in life, money can't buy us everything. Singapore has moved to a stage (thanks to the founding fathers of Singapore - note I did not say thanks to PAP) where a sizeable portion of us don't have to worry about a roof and food, and we realized that we are not children anymore, we need to grow and we want to grow. And we don't want to leave another Singaporean behind.

Because there are many Singaporeans left behind. When I do my volunteer work on Sundays, where I cook a hot meal and distribute rations to the elderly, I am almost in tears when I see the uncle with NOTHING in his rental flat. And I mean nothing. I see the lady who needs to crawl to the door to receive our rations, I see families living in the corridors illegally because they have nowhere to go, and I wonder why nothing more is being done. Why are the policies not going down to the people who need it the most?

I ABSOLUTELY CANNOT understand how Vivian Balakrishnan can take his millions of dollars of salary, get hundreds of thousands of dollars of pay increment and 8 months bonus, but simply REFUSE to help any of these people. His now famous words when the deeply respected Dr Lily asked for more money for the poor were simply: How much do you want? Enough for a hawker centre, food court or restaurant? He then increased funding from $260 per month, to $290 per month. A $1 a day increase. We are talking about people who CANNOT work for a multitude of reasons, and $290 a month, all in. How does he sleep at night?

WHERE did our soul go? Where did our heart go? What is happening to my country?

How did citizens become just a number in a factory environment churning GDP figures? GDP is a terrible measure of the standard of living, easily affected by outliers, because it measures the average and not the median (this would be an entire article, so please wiki/google). I don't want the next generation to grow up in a country where being anything other than an Engineer, Doctor, or god forbid, a Lawyer, is being looked down on. He/she cannot think that "I want to be a carpenter", or "I want to be a musician" and be told to be more practical and get a real job. Because these are passions and these are dreams. Without passions, and without dreams we are nothing.

What is life to live if life is just an empty chase of money?

I have no fear, because I am not stupid. The incumbent paints nightmare scenarios: women being maids, children getting raped, we'll all be jobless. But the incumbent has not shown how or why this will be the case. Their manifesto says nothing, and they forget that the ever strong civil service will run with or without them, and they will work hand in hand with whoever is in the Parliament to make it work. And if it doesn't work, that's fine because we Singaporeans know now that we are empowered and we will make it all work, together.

The incumbent asks for track record, well WP and Mr Chiam have 20 years behind them. And just for the record, neither do the majority of your newbies have any track record to speak of. Which also brings me to my next point dear PAP, your track record for the past 5 years is nothing but fail. We look nice on the outside, but we are rotting on the inside. Many people have already touch on this, so I'll skip it.

Benson tells me not to cry, but cry I will, tears of joy when Worker's Party emerges victorious, or tears of disappointment when PAP does a clean sweep of the Parliament.

The time has come, and I can feel change is in the air, I don't want to see my country rot anymore, and I will be the change that I want to be.

#####

You need to read some of these excellent writings that I've been reading:

https://www.facebook.com/notes/lin-shiyun/taking-a-step-back-and-looking-at-this-ge-fondly/10150239449639612

https://www.facebook.com/notes/benson-tan/what-it-means-to-be-singaporean/213059685378370

https://www.facebook.com/notes/verdy-wildcard/what-you-can-vote-for-updated-may-5th-impt-disclaimer/10150235776081474

And this is a MUST read -

https://www.facebook.com/notes/theonlinecitizen/i-suspect-we-have-started-to-believe-our-own-propaganda/395224663963

Thank you.

Dr. Vivian Balakrishnan

Some people articulate things better than I do, and I find myself lacking the time to write an insightful piece at this point in time. So I direct you to read this excellent article: http://kirstenhan.me/2011/04/25/dr-balakrishnan-y-u-no-play-fair/

Eisen Teo asked me to write him

So I read this article that day (see it here: http://cjcpig.wordpress.com/2011/04/13/gen-y-think-outside-that-kate-spade-box/) and I was suitably upset and I tweeted. Eisen himself replied and asked me to email him, so well I did and here it is:

----

Dear Eisen,

I wasn't going to write you an email, but since you replied my tweet asking for an email, I guess there's no harm writing. I've also written to your uneducated forum editor Mr Yap, but didn't receive his reply. I still however hope to receive yours. Anyhow I say that Mr Yap is uneducated because of his responses to Mr Samuel Wee, which clearly demonstrated to us that he has no comprehension capabilities, basic grasps of mathematics, or both. And going by the coverage of this election, I say both.

But that's enough of him.

I must say that initially I was very appalled, and even angry to read your editorial piece, because I find the thinly veiled attempt to defend Tin Pei Ling an insult to Singaporeans, and also I question who gave you the authority to represent us, Gen Y, to lecture us.

The Gen Y did not attack Tin Pei Ling because of her youth. This is clearly evident in your own editorial where you made a huge contradiction. You said that the Gen Y flamed and virtually-lynched Tin Pei Ling, dug through her then-public Facebook and Twitter account because she is young and took a photo with the now infamous "twist" and a Kate Spade box. And you then noted only ONE comparison of her and Mr Chen, amongst the many other younger candidates, that Mr Chen has been "mislabeled" by his peers as being troublesome and attention seeking. And that's it. C'est tout, pas autre chose.

I am not sure if it is immediately obvious, but for the rest of us there is a huge difference - NONE of the other young candidates have been "flamed" or "lynched" by the Gen Y netizens online. And no, this is not because Tin Pei Ling is a girl. I assure you if she was a guy she would have been flamed more, and definitely the poor guy's sexuality will be even pulled to the forefront. It is because Tin Pei Ling, through her own actions, her own speeches previously, her Facebook, her interviews and etc have shown herself to be useless.

This has nothing to do with her gender nor her age, and if any of the OTHER young candidates did anything remotely similar to her, we would have torn them asunder online as well. And less we forget, during the last General Elections, something as minor as a form being filled up with one error raised more ruckus than this.

So what did she do? She has no opinion of any issues firstly, she does not think that the rich-poor divide is any of the government's responsibility, her biggest regret in her life is to have not yet brought her parents to Universal Studios, and then she stomped her feet petulantly on national television.

The "noise" that is heard online is not noise but its the sentiments of the electorate. It is saying that we do NOT want a person like that to represent us, and what is flaming all this anger is because the Gen Y Singaporeans know full well that unless something catastrophic happen, she is going to march in to Parliament, Kate Spade bag and all, with ease. If this was a functioning democracy, we could use our votes and make sure that Tin Pei Ling does not get voted in.

But in this unique GRC system where she happens to be running for Marine Parade together with Senior Minister Goh Chok Tong (the last time I checked, this was the case), we can safely say that if we vote for SM Goh, she will definitely get in, and other more credible opposition candidates will not. Simply because. And a more active youth, who has done much more than her, can present a better case than her and be so much so much more, has to climb Mount Everest, and this is the anger.

The anger is not towards her per-se, but at our inability to make sure that Tin Pei Ling doesn't get into Parliament, and this frustrates Singaporeans, that our votes can only do this much. I am not sure how many people will sacrifice SM Goh to make sure Tin Pei Ling does not get in.

So no, we are not going to be any nicer to anyone just because they are in our demographics, as I am quite sure that you are not asking us to vote for one race because we are of one race, because this is a very dangerous implication in a harmonious society like ours.

So how do I feel about Tin Pei Ling as a Gen Y? Let's just say that I don't want my taxes to pay for her internship. She can go do her internship somewhere else.

Sincerely,

Scott

-----

It turns Yahoo is giving much better election coverage than the other mainstream media http://sg.news.yahoo.com/generalelections/

I am going to blog soon

Note to self and readers: I am preparing to write about:
1. Reply to http://www.todayonline.com/Singapore/EDC110407-0000374/Room-for-religion-in-public-discourse
2. A few words on the election.

See you soon dear readers!

An Open Letter To Singaporeans

I found this video online, and while I would not use the word screwed, I think it does really highlight the disconnect between the powers that be and the ordinary citizen. Perspective is important when reading and watching everything online, but form a justified opinion for yourself.

I fondly remember the pre-election words and then the subsequent increase in GST...... will we see that this year?

They even brought out the carry-a-baby-photo arsenal, who knows what's next?

Letter to ST Forum: Request for explanation of your explanation to Mr. Wee

Dear Mr Yap,

I am not writing in to the forum but rather writing to you as the Forum Editor. In light of that, I sincerely hope you will not massacre my email by editing it to one that does not convey the meaning it is supposed to convey, and then reading it back to yourself thinking that this email is being written to praise you of your excellent work that you have done thus far. It is not.

Rather this letter is written by a very perplexed reader of The Straits Times, who is wondering about what really happens in the newsroom of our national broadsheet, and also about your education level, specifically in Mathematics and in understanding the semantics of what is being written. Correct me if I am wrong, but did you pass your PSLE Mathematics? And did you actually graduate? I'm asking because, I'm not sure about you, but most of my friends who read Mr. Samuel Wee's original letter knew full well what he was trying to say.

Which then really surprised us when we read your edited version (or whoever the editor was and since your title is the Forum Editor, I assume that to be you) of his letter to be diametrically opposite of the intended meaning. I can go on about educating you on semantics, but if many years of education by our excellent schools, which your paper brings glowing report on every now and then, cannot teach you, I sincerely doubt my one email will be able to do that.

I'm writing for an explanation of your explanation/justification to Mr. Wee. You pointed out that there was a "factual error" when Mr Wee claimed that 90% of children from one-to-three-room flats do not make it to university, and you then "corrected" it to 50% of these children made it to university AND POLYTECHNIC. A factual error means that the facts were wrong, and ironically, Mr. Wee was quoting a statistics that your paper wrote, and you "corrected" it while referring to the same statistic but using a different group (university VS university & polytechnic). So can you please explain where his factual error is? Unless you are implying that the statistic that Mr. Wee and yourself cited is wrong, in which case, aren't you repeating the so-called "factual error".

Also, you claim "sense" as a reason for this edit, because it did not made sense for Mr. Wee to be elated at this statistic. I suppose sarcasm and irony are difficult concepts to grasp, and your demonstration of your understanding of his letter, and of course your poor mathematical skills, underscores this. To explain this concept to you, I refer to the dictionary:

Sarcasm: the use of irony to mock or convey contempt : his voice, hardened by sarcasm, could not hide his resentment.

Irony: the expression of one's meaning by using language that normally signifies the opposite.

Which suffice to say, Mr. Wee was trying to say that he was NEITHER elated, NOR was it heartwarming that 90% of children from one-to-three-room flats DID NOT make it to university. To write in a way that you would understand what he meant: "It is disappointing that only 10% of children from one-to-three-room flats make it to university".

"Factual errors" aside, which I believe readers of The Straits Times can pardon now that we know your level of intelligence, to rewrite a writer's opinion and substituting it with one of your own on the basis of "contextual error and sense" is really hard to understand. I mean, maybe your understanding of opinion differs from mine, but we have always been brought up to believe that forum was to allow Singaporeans to voice their opinions, not for you or your team to edit the meaning into your own, because then it would be your opinion, or your assumed understanding of the writers' intended opinion.

If you have felt that the author was making that much error, then as your auto-reply suggests, with more than 70 letters received a day, I am sure you can always choose to publish another letter.

I am actually not hoping for a good explanation from you, having seen your weak and feeble attempt to Mr. Wee, but I am sincerely hoping that you will try, and perhaps let me know in the process that you have sufficient educational qualification to be a forum editor. If not, I surely hope that you will stay only as a forum editor and not move on to any other position because really, I only read The Strait Times for the Regional and World news (most of which are syndicated anyway) and I want to continue to perform my patriotic duty and support The Strait Times. Now that's irony for you

Sincerely,
Scott Teng

######

For those who needs background and context:

1. http://visaisahero.wordpress.com/2011/03/22/more-straits-times-wizardry/
2. http://visaisahero.wordpress.com/2011/03/25/sts-justification-of-its-liberal-editing-of-forum-opinions/

Love, is a temporary madness
Erupts like an earthquake and then subsides
And when it does, you gotta make a decision

You have to work out whether
Your roots have become so entwined together
That it is inconceivable that you should ever be
Apart

Because this is what love is

Love is not breathlessness
Not passion
Not excitement
And not the promulgation of promises

That is just being "in love"

Love itself is what is left over
When being "in love" has burned away

A fortunate accident




One of my all time favourite songs

I can't write anything!

I realized that it is hard for me to write something when I don't feel any extremities of emotion. In fact the lack of this "emotion" that makes me write, is making this particular blog entry a bit tough to put together.

I can't quite figure out why though. I mean I have an opinion about a lot of things, well except the Israel and Palestine situation because I really don't know anything about it. Lynette can enlighten us on this however, I believe she wrote either an essay or her thesis on it. But that's besides the point.

So this got me thinking, about why do people write what they write. And some of you might know that I am extremely interested in motivations of behavior, i.e., why people do what they do. So I started to question why I write on this blog.

Once upon a time (and this was REALLY long ago, and I'm talking about like geocities, angelfire era, circa 1998 like OMG old right?) I created my first website, and there was some semblance of writing there. I remember that I started by writing about my life. It was like a diary of sorts. Almost like those you would hide under the bed/pillow/insert wherever you hide your diary. I remember we bloggers even had a manifesto, which is to respect what others wrote, if you didn't agree with the writer, or didn't like what you read, well please stop reading.

I remember that I blogged all about my school life, my crushes and everything in between. Family, relationships, broken relationships and what have you. Then slowly and slowly, I wrote less and less frequently. And then its shorter and shorter, and it became more and more cryptic. And these days, I just post up my thoughts on issues and even that its still far lesser. WHY?

I don't know really. I guess one could easily say that its because we are all "grown up" now, and thus we are more busy with the corporate life, busy in the rat race, fighting for I-don't-know-what. But it is also that sometimes I feel that as we grow up, we get more private, or we feel a lesser need to share our emotions. At least no publicly. Because frankly, what purpose does it achieve right? But then I realize that this reason does not hold because when I feel emotional about social causes I would still write it down.

I think perhaps its just the relationship part. Indeed the older we, or rather I get, it seems to feel very different. On the heart. It is true that you really feel something on your heart. It is a heartache because you actually feel that pain. Even the joy, the passion, the depth, the intensity is oddly different.

Maybe this is what growing up is? Learning to take things in your stride.

Reality?

Some things only becomes real when they are put into words

Interesting concept isn't it? Although honestly at 1am, I am really not able to elaborate on this very well. So i'll leave it as a good food thought at the moment.

The Plain @ Craig Road

After discovering The Plain about a month or so ago, and I've been there quite a few times especially for their brekkie, we decided to have lunch there today. It was @alexischeong's first time there, so as always she went camera crazy.

The Plain is a Melbourne inspired cafe (say hello to Vincent from Melbourne when you are there), and they rightly serve good coffee that Melburnians are accustomed to. Suffice to say, after you try that, you will NEVER drink Starbucks ever again. After my first cup of Melbourne coffee, I have only had 2 cups of Starbucks till date (and I didn't really have a choice during those 2 times)

I'll let the pictures do the talking. You can see more on @alexischeong's blog.

- life is indeed too short for bad coffees -

- which is why you need good lattes -

- and good ciabattas (salami and pastrami) -

- love the green sofa -

- and the decor -


- and the lovely setting -

Visit and say hello to Vincent and Leslie and tell them you are Scott's friends!

---

trading hours
open daily 7.30am - 7.30pm
closed the second & last wednesday of the month

enquiries / bookings
✆ +65 6225 4387
✉ 50 Craig Road, #01-01
Singapore 089688

I don't understand why Singaporean parents insist on having their kindergarten children go through a ceremony.

My dad told me about this crazy woman today who wrote to The State Times (letter copied below and can be read here until ST removes it) to complain about how her precious son cannot attend the kindergarten ceremony. Oh the horror right, so of course I had to read it. Oh the horror indeed - at the crazy woman.

She wrote to ST forum because the kindergarten (in their infinite wisdom, I must say) chose to do away with a full fledge graduation, but instead have a class representative to collect the scrolls, and put more effort into a song and dance item.

I think that this is a great idea because this is after-all a kindergarten. This is not high school, nor college. The kindergarten "degree" is nothing more than a certificate, and it is not even compulsory for children to attend. This mom sounds like those crazy competitive mom who would enroll her son in every damn course available, just so that SHE can get her own satisfaction of seeing her son go on stage to collect some award.

What about her son's feeling? Surely we don't want children as young as 5 or 6, to think that going on stage to get that scroll is the most important thing on earth; and other equally important parts in life such as having fun, being a team player (hence the dance) should be overlooked. At their time in life now, they should learn and enjoy learning in every way, not only in academics.

I am sorry, but I honestly do not see what this crazy woman's issue is, so much so that she needs to write to the press. And her words - of how the omission of the ceremony will "painfully felt by the parents" is so dramatic that, it left me speechless (well not exactly, considering the length of this note). But honestly if she has been to a graduation ceremony, the pain is sitting through 900 other names.

Of course the moment we get our scroll is a moment of glory for our parents, but seriously, yhis is KINDERGARTEN.

I have no more words left to say but that this woman is dumb. And boy am I glad I am not her son. She might be sad to find out that only in Singapore, do we have a graduation ceremony where we all go on stage individually. In most other countries, a representative collects it on his cohort's behalf.

But she will be too dumb to know anyway.

EDIT: I think we should do away with the scroll altogether for kindergarten. Why allow children so young to wonder why is some other kid chosen and not me (though I believe that they seldom feel that way, and its the parents who make their children feel this way).


-----------
Nov 11, 2010, ST

I ATTENDED the full-dress rehearsal of my six-year-old son's graduation ceremony at a grassroots kindergarten, PCF Pioneer Kindergarten, last Sunday.

I expected to see him and his fellow graduands go through the full, happy process - putting on graduation gowns and going on stage to collect their scrolls as the photographer took pictures.

Instead, the ceremony was reduced to a superficial shadow of what such milestones should be.

A pupil went on stage to receive the scrolls on behalf of each class. The focus appeared to be on the accompanying concert.

Shocked, I questioned the principal, who replied that the truncated ceremony had been the kindergarten's practice.

I was also given to understand that it was too time-consuming to have each pupil go on stage as the ceremony involved hundreds of graduating preschoolers.

Shouldn't the organisers focus on the primary purpose of the graduation ceremony, which is to acknowledge and celebrate the completion of a child's preschool education - marking that first milestone in their journey of lifelong learning?

Is the success of a dance item or two more important than recognising a child's first rite of passage?

Does the PCF headquarters issue guidelines to its kindergartens to ensure that such acknowledgements remain the primary focus of the ceremony?

My son's kindergarten ceremony is tomorrow. Except for the class representative, he and his fellow classmates face the unhappy prospect of not wearing the graduation gowns, not hearing their names called, not going on stage to receive their scrolls and not having their pictures taken.

The kindergarten may argue that it had fulfilled these separately earlier, but such canned arrangements of convenience defeat the purpose and spirit of a graduation ceremony.

The kindergarten's omission will be felt painfully by parents, unless the organisers do the proper thing: change its attitude and the ceremony, quickly.

Yap Wai Ling (Mrs)

If how I feel about my country is non of your business SM Goh, then why are you and your team leading our country?

When I read this article (http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=450063718719) on The Straits Times, the biggest thing that jumps to my face is how disconnected the ruling party is with the citizens, especially the future pillars of our country.

Already prices are going through the roof. Aside from the elites and the middle upper class of Singapore, everyone else is feeling the pinch of our policies. And of course we are still pandering to the rich, the elites of the foreign country, importing the foreigners by the tens of thousands to an already crowded Singapore. But these are the concerns of today's Singaporean working adult, and not entirely that of the younger Singaporeans.

When it comes down to the younger generation that is the Gen Y and below, the concerns are not just monetary. Its about how disempowered and the sense that we don't belong here that we are concerned about. And dear SM Goh's reply made me think about why is he even leading our country with his team.

We (as in my and my friends kinda we) were discussing today about this today and really the issue is not about foreigners. At least not directly, but the issue is about how we don't feel that we have the rights, the power to do anything here. We are just told time and time again, through our propaganda machinery that is the press, about decisions that are already made.

Our policies are all about the money, all about the foreigners and our relentless development. And at what cost we must ask ourselves. I was just saying to quite a few people that I have no memories about this place. All my childhood memory is gone, nothing in my childhood exist today. Anything and everything will be razed to the ground in the name of development. As if hardware is all that is important in a country.

People do not matter here in Singapore, we are just a number, a statistic. Who really cares about the Singaporeans? This is why we import foreigners at the rate that we are. Aside from being able to buy those damn HDB, and the passport that gives us mostly visa-less travel, and that some of the privilege few gets a good education, I cannot think of much more "benefits" of being a Singaporean.

Who loves Singapore? The foreigners of course. We literally kiss the ground they walk on, so of course they love Singapore. They can just come in here, earn all the money they want to, and then leave. If they love Singapore so much, ask them all to become Singapore citizen and give up their own citizenship then. And then you see how much "love" that they have. Hypocrites much.

Stupid are the people who will read this and go, but no country is perfect. Obviously not, nobody ever said that any country is perfect, or that there is a perfect system. But more stupid are people who think that this is the best and therefore we shouldn't change nor improve.

Singapore is a great place for foreigners for example. We do have ridiculously cheap food (but at what expense to the hawkers, we might want to question). Singapore is also safe and efficient, almost like clockwork. But when you ask anyone about Singapore, you will then realize that everyone will tell you about the tangibles, but there's nothing intangible that anyone will miss about Singapore.

Telling isn't it? And food, really? When you have travelled enough, you will realize that there's nothing spectacular about our food, aside from it being cheap.

If my family is not in Singapore, I will really not be here. Because this is not home for me. Nowhere is home to me. I am in a place, and this place is Singapore at the moment. My home is where my family is. I don't miss Singapore as a place when I overseas, I miss my family who are in Singapore.

If SM Goh cannot understand this, he should perhaps ask his own daughter. Who happens to be, surprise surprise, NOT in Singapore

You should also read: http://lacedivory.blogspot.com/2010/10/my-love-hate-relationship-with-my.html

9 full months later

I can quite safely say that, the dust has finally settled. And for those who know what 平常心 means, I'm finally able to say that everything has been replaced a 平常心.

A stone has finally been lifted from these shoulders for the past 9 months. It has not been easy. I must say I managed to have nearly zero collateral damage along the way.

I don't know what else to say here, but that I am grateful. This is why it was the best.

Thank you.

Long weekend and Universal Studios with Mommy

I was not making plans to go out over the long weekend at all, but alas my plans were foiled by the long weekend. Totally wrecked my I-am-not-going-out-in-September plans. I am like flat broke for a variety of reasons. But anyway over the long weekend I caught up with some old friends, and it was always a great pleasure to do so.

Started with catching up with D. Haven't seen her for almost half a year, so it was awesome to just meet and chat and had the most thoughtful service @ The Handburger, Raffles City. They sorta forgot the order, and checked on us after realizing. Aside from making sure that our food came pronto, they not only waived off the service charge, but gave us a 10% discount on top of that. Talk about being thoughtful.

the handburger with pesto mushroom

chocolate affrogato @ TCC for desserts

And on Friday was my friends whom I didn't get to see for awhile, and KTV didn't happen because HY had to go back and take care of J =(

Most pleasant surprise came in the form of a call with news of free tickets to Universal Studios on Saturday, complete with meal vouchers and retail vouchers. So despite my earlier quarrel with mommy, I was sorta excited to go out with her.

Mom and I have our silly tiffs and fights all the time, but I love her dearly. And its been a while since I've gone out with her, so we quickly finished what we had to do, put on our summer clothes and went to Sentosa. It was quite a lot of fun really. We even took a roller coaster. Mommy was so scared though. She kept her eyes closed and held on to my arms so tightly.

ABSOLUTELY worth mentioning is Steven Spielberg's Lights, Camera, Action. They showed us how they recreate special effects in the studio, and the special effect in question is a Category 4 hurricane in New York. It was quite awesome and amazing I must say. The lights and sounds and fire and water and wind really took my breath away. Not going to bore with the little details but I think these little family moments remind me of how blessed I am.

Like how seeing my little brother all grown up and entering NS, and us having a nice family dinner together right before he enters. Also seeing A's family having a feast at the same time, adds that loving warm touch. I guess when we all grow up, its so easy to just neglect the family, always thinking that they will always be around. In life, there is really little room for neglect. I am glad that instead of sticking to my original plan, this kismet of an event happened and I spent it with mommy.

Hopefully there'll be more family time with the rest of them. Remember to show your appreciation for the ones you love =)