today was somewhat like the first time, i prepared myself to go to town and shop alone. i used to really hate the feeling. i've always hated being alone. till this day, i have never watched a movie alone. other than the occasional groceries shopping and errands running nearby, i absolutely hate doing things by myself.

the first time i explored an area by myself, was in san fran. and it was such an interesting experience. so interesting that i decided to walk around town today. over and on top of the fact that i had to run some errands in town.

so off i went, and i shopped and walked and went all over. and it was such fun. i thoroughly enjoyed myself. it also made me realised certain things. i've made peace with myself. i've come to terms with the past.

maybe you are right. maybe a break-up isn't all bad. if all we want is to be happy, why are we so unhappy together. life is so unexpected, and i suppose that's what makes life so interesting, because we never know what's going to happen.

what the future may bring, i am anticipating. memories, no longer bring pain, but nostalgia knowing that we've spend such great times together. the best times of my life were spent with you. but those are in the past. i won't get anywhere if i keep getting stuck in the past that will never be my future.

i've been happy. at times conflicting emotions. but mostly, i've been happy. at worse i feel melancholy. and its amazing really how i manage to pull through. i never thought i would survived, i never even thought i would feel better. but i did somehow.